A WORD OF CAUTION
11-14-2005 | 04:24 PM
#11
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 13,082
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From:
RE: A WORD OF CAUTION
I am so sorry. That must be very hard for you. Not that you are even looking for advice, but I think I would just "man up" and admit to her you screwed up and are willing to do what it takes for her to come back.
It's hard. Hunting season only comes once a year, and sometimes the wives don't understand. But then again, sometimes WE don't understand either.
I am in Missouri, and opening day for rifle season was Saturday. Our anniversary is today (monday) and I gave up opening weekend to spend with her. But on the bright side, that afforded me the luxury of leaving for 4 days this coming weekend. It's give and take, I hope it works out for you. I truely do.
It's hard. Hunting season only comes once a year, and sometimes the wives don't understand. But then again, sometimes WE don't understand either.
I am in Missouri, and opening day for rifle season was Saturday. Our anniversary is today (monday) and I gave up opening weekend to spend with her. But on the bright side, that afforded me the luxury of leaving for 4 days this coming weekend. It's give and take, I hope it works out for you. I truely do.
11-14-2005 | 05:22 PM
#13
Giant Nontypical
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 5,973
Likes: 0
From: One mile east of West Podunk Tx
RE: A WORD OF CAUTION
I have been married for 2 1/2 years and have an 11 mo. old daughter. If my family left me I would be devistated. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Thank you for sharing your pain with us. If it wakes one guy up you did some good today. I don't know if you are a spiritual man but you might try turning to God. "Thy rod andThy staff, they comfort me".
11-14-2005 | 05:35 PM
#14
Giant Nontypical
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 5,062
Likes: 0
From: Minnesota
RE: A WORD OF CAUTION
Man, I know how you feel, My wife decided after 6 years together, that she just didnt want to be married anymore, and the really bad part was that we had a 2 year old little boy. We were in the midde of moving from the Twin Cities in Mn, to Austin Mn. (about 2 hours away) she decided that she was going to stay in the Cities, and I already had a new job in Austin. 2 years later, she met some guy from North Dakota, and she took my son and moved out there, 10 hours one way. Needless to say I dont get to see my son very much.
(he is now 13). Any ways, this isnt about me or anyone else on here. There is not really anything anyone can say to make it better, but if you ever need to vent or just talk about things, feel free to PM me. Good luck in working things out. Keep us posted on how things are going.
(he is now 13). Any ways, this isnt about me or anyone else on here. There is not really anything anyone can say to make it better, but if you ever need to vent or just talk about things, feel free to PM me. Good luck in working things out. Keep us posted on how things are going.
11-14-2005 | 06:36 PM
#15
Typical Buck
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 773
Likes: 0
From: central illinois
RE: A WORD OF CAUTION
maybe a compromise? teach her how to hunt, my wife got a bow (shoots it very well) and loves to hunt with or without me with her! Hope things work out for the best for you, keep trying
11-14-2005 | 07:08 PM
#16
Nontypical Buck
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 4,701
Likes: 0
From: Wadena, MN
RE: A WORD OF CAUTION
I got devorced in 2000, the difference is i fought for my kids( and won). So now she drives to see them on the odd weekends. Keep you chin up man dont give up on your kid!!!!!!!!! Fight like hell for them. Trust me there will be another woman. Only 1 child!!!!!!!!!
11-14-2005 | 08:08 PM
#17
Giant Nontypical
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 7,051
Likes: 0
From: Jackson, Missouri
RE: A WORD OF CAUTION
Man, that's gotta hurt. I am SOO sorry! Hopefully, the communication hasn't broken down between you guys yet, and you can still work things out...
For some of the others that this hasn't happened to, and who are smart enough to NOT want it to happen (I know, it's easy to be full of machismo when typing on a computer screen under a cloud of anonymity...), I went back and pulled a reply that my wife wrote to Antler Eater on his "A Mailman Delivers..." post. While some of it is personally addressed to him, some of the points she makes on here are worthy of pointing out. The emphasis is mine, for the benefit of this thread.
For some of the others that this hasn't happened to, and who are smart enough to NOT want it to happen (I know, it's easy to be full of machismo when typing on a computer screen under a cloud of anonymity...), I went back and pulled a reply that my wife wrote to Antler Eater on his "A Mailman Delivers..." post. While some of it is personally addressed to him, some of the points she makes on here are worthy of pointing out. The emphasis is mine, for the benefit of this thread.
Ken,
This is MQ1shooter's wife, Alison. First, I want to echo what so many others have said about the awesome story and beautiful buck. Thanks also for the kind words and credit you have given me in some of your posts. Greg always shows me them. It is very easy to be supportive of him with his hunting because he is such a wonderful, Godly man and he makes sure first that I feel loved and provided for and he is, of course,a fabulous father to Matthew. He has made many of my dreams come true so how could I deny him anything that he enjoys so much? Sometimes I do miss him some during deer season and I tell him and he will say ok, I won't go hunting tomorrow, get a sitter and we will go to dinner and a movie. I know what a sacrafice that is for him, especially during the rut, and we have a great time together and then I don't mind when he is gone a lot for the next couple of weeks or so because he makes it clear to me with his actions, not just his words, that I am the most important thing.Just a tip for some of you out there,but in case you haven't figured it out big bucks are nice but not as much fun to cuddle up with on a coldevening or morning.As Greg hasproven here often, he is no dummy!
No offense to all of you but actually what I mind more than the actual deer hunting is all the time he spends on the internet talking to you all. 
But we compromise! It is a good thing that I have always supported Greg with his hunting even before we had Matthew because now I would have to be supportive anyway if not as a wife as a mother!!I predict that Matthew will be an even more devoted and avid hunter than his daddy. He literally goes nuts when he sees the deer. He goes crazy when we pass those "deer crossing warning signs"you see on the road. He thinks that means we are going to see a deer right then and he wants me to slow down so he can see it. Tryexplaining that toa 2 year old!!! Last night we pretty much had to pry his fingers off the antlers and drag him in the house kicking and screaming; he did not want to leave that buck. He was perfectly prepared to spend the night out there with his new "friend"!! Thanks again for your kind words to us both and hope you have a good rest of the season. Congrats also on that new grandbaby, Abby; I am sure she is beautiful.
This is MQ1shooter's wife, Alison. First, I want to echo what so many others have said about the awesome story and beautiful buck. Thanks also for the kind words and credit you have given me in some of your posts. Greg always shows me them. It is very easy to be supportive of him with his hunting because he is such a wonderful, Godly man and he makes sure first that I feel loved and provided for and he is, of course,a fabulous father to Matthew. He has made many of my dreams come true so how could I deny him anything that he enjoys so much? Sometimes I do miss him some during deer season and I tell him and he will say ok, I won't go hunting tomorrow, get a sitter and we will go to dinner and a movie. I know what a sacrafice that is for him, especially during the rut, and we have a great time together and then I don't mind when he is gone a lot for the next couple of weeks or so because he makes it clear to me with his actions, not just his words, that I am the most important thing.Just a tip for some of you out there,but in case you haven't figured it out big bucks are nice but not as much fun to cuddle up with on a coldevening or morning.As Greg hasproven here often, he is no dummy!
No offense to all of you but actually what I mind more than the actual deer hunting is all the time he spends on the internet talking to you all. But we compromise! It is a good thing that I have always supported Greg with his hunting even before we had Matthew because now I would have to be supportive anyway if not as a wife as a mother!!I predict that Matthew will be an even more devoted and avid hunter than his daddy. He literally goes nuts when he sees the deer. He goes crazy when we pass those "deer crossing warning signs"you see on the road. He thinks that means we are going to see a deer right then and he wants me to slow down so he can see it. Tryexplaining that toa 2 year old!!! Last night we pretty much had to pry his fingers off the antlers and drag him in the house kicking and screaming; he did not want to leave that buck. He was perfectly prepared to spend the night out there with his new "friend"!! Thanks again for your kind words to us both and hope you have a good rest of the season. Congrats also on that new grandbaby, Abby; I am sure she is beautiful.
11-14-2005 | 11:09 PM
#18
Nontypical Buck
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 3,903
Likes: 0
From: Wisconsin
RE: A WORD OF CAUTION
Sorry to hear that man!! Only advice I can give is any talking you do should be with her. Show her how much you love her , don't just tell her , and if she still loves you she will come back.
Just thought I'd add that my wife and I had problems years back. It's real easy for us guys to just take things for granted , including our spouses , thinking that things will never change so we shouldn't have to put in the effort that we did when we started dating them. Women are definately different creatures man. They require the same emotional attachment that we showed them when we were trying to sweep them off their feet ,for their entire lives. I'm glad I figured that out before it was too late.
My wife and I had many fights about me going hunting or fishing. I always thought it was nothing but selfish b.s. on her part until I was forced to stand back and look at the big picture.
When I got my head out of my arse and figured out how this woman species operates , things have changed like night and day.
Now that I put her and the kids first and foremost , the way it should be , she no longer has a problem with me hunting , in fact when I have a bad day in the woods she is sympathetic. She realizes that I love her and the kids more than anything ,and she also realizes how much I love hunting ,and even if it's not her thing , she loves me too much to even think about asking me to quit doing something I love , and for that , I love her even more.
Just thought I'd add that my wife and I had problems years back. It's real easy for us guys to just take things for granted , including our spouses , thinking that things will never change so we shouldn't have to put in the effort that we did when we started dating them. Women are definately different creatures man. They require the same emotional attachment that we showed them when we were trying to sweep them off their feet ,for their entire lives. I'm glad I figured that out before it was too late.
My wife and I had many fights about me going hunting or fishing. I always thought it was nothing but selfish b.s. on her part until I was forced to stand back and look at the big picture.
When I got my head out of my arse and figured out how this woman species operates , things have changed like night and day.
Now that I put her and the kids first and foremost , the way it should be , she no longer has a problem with me hunting , in fact when I have a bad day in the woods she is sympathetic. She realizes that I love her and the kids more than anything ,and she also realizes how much I love hunting ,and even if it's not her thing , she loves me too much to even think about asking me to quit doing something I love , and for that , I love her even more.
11-14-2005 | 11:20 PM
#19
Nontypical Buck
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 1,279
Likes: 0
From: New Jersey USA
RE: A WORD OF CAUTION
OHBowhunter, I will pray that you and your family reconcile. The lord works in mysterious ways, you never know what this could lead too. If it works out you may be stronger for it, if it doesn't maybe in the long run thats what God had planned.
11-15-2005 | 09:24 PM
#20
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 379
Likes: 0
From: OH
RE: A WORD OF CAUTION
I feel for you man, I really do. I was married for 7 years, had 2 kids. The wife got tired of me being gone all the time, and headed for greener pastures. I was only 29. It was HELL going thru that divorce, and not a day goes by that I don't regret it. Even though I've been remarried for 6 years, and now have FIVE kids...my first 2 kids have had so much more stress in their life, because their parents were divorced. I'm happy now, but if I was a younger me, and it was "back then", I'd have BUSTED MY ASS trying to make it work. It was mountain biking/racing with me back then (and I was in the Army), but being gone is being gone. Good luck man, and I'll say a prayer for you. Treat your wife like she's a 210 B/C, and start putting in the hours to take her back. 
If you CAN'T work it out with her, try to stay as friendly as possible for the kids, and be sure to be a central figure in your kids life. We only get one DAD. Okay, enough rambling from a nobody that wasn't asked for an opinion.
If you CAN'T work it out with her, try to stay as friendly as possible for the kids, and be sure to be a central figure in your kids life. We only get one DAD. Okay, enough rambling from a nobody that wasn't asked for an opinion.