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And on the brighter side for us older people...................

[blockquote] TELL ME THIS WON'T HAPPEN TO US !!!
[/blockquote]
THE DARNDEST PLACES:
[blockquote]
An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to the dispatcher: "They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake pedal and even the accelerator!" she cried.

The dispatcher said, "Stay calm. An officer is on the way."

A few minutes later, the officer radios in. "Disregard." He says. "She got in the back-seat by mistake."
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[/blockquote] [blockquote] FAMILY
[/blockquote] [blockquote]
Three sisters, ages 92, 94 and 96, live in a house together. One night the 96-year-old draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses. She yells to the other sisters, "Was I getting in or out of the bath?"
The 94-year-old yells back, "I don't know. I'll come up and see." She starts up the stairs and pauses "Was I going up the stairs or down?"
The 92-year-old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea listening to her sisters. She shakes her head and says, "I sure hope I never get that forgetful, knock on wood." She then yells, "I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door."
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[/blockquote] [blockquote] "I CAN HEAR JUST FINE!"
[/blockquote] [blockquote]
Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day. One remarked to the other, "Windy, isn't it?"

"No," the second man replied, "it's Thursday."

And the third man chimed in, "So am I. Let's have a beer."
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[/blockquote] [blockquote] LITTLE LADY:
[/blockquote] [blockquote]
A little old lady was running up and down the halls in a nursing home. As she walked, she would flip up the hem of her nightgown and say "Supersex." She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair. Flipping her gown at him, she said, "Supersex."

He sat silently for a moment or two and finally answered, "I'll take the soup."
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[/blockquote] [blockquote] OLD FRIENDS:
[/blockquote] [blockquote]
Now this one is just too Precious.. LOL !

Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day, they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, "Now don't get mad at me .. I know we've been friends for a long time, but I just can't think of your name! I've thought and thought, but I can't remember it. Please tell me what your name is."
[/blockquote] [blockquote]
Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her. Finally she said, "How soon do you need to know?"
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[/blockquote] [blockquote] SENIOR DRIVING
[/blockquote] [blockquote]
As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!"

"Heck," said Herman, "It's not just one car. It's hundreds of them!"
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[/blockquote] [blockquote] DRIVING
[/blockquote] [blockquote]
Two elderly women were out driving in a large car - both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself "I must be losing it. I could have sworn we just went through a red light." After a few more minutes, they came to another intersection and the light was red again Again, they went right through. The woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she was losing it. She was getting nervous. At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was red and they went on through. So, she turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred, did you know that we just ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us both!"
Mildred turned to her and said, "Oh, crap, am I driving ?"

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[/blockquote] TELL ME THIS WON'T HAPPEN TO US !!!

We have plenty of replacements coming up from Mexico. If you run short I am sure that we can send you some.

HH

ARE YOU SERIOUS that means my macs will close and i wont get a slushy for my morning hunt gesssssssssss, whats this world coming tooo.............heheheheh

OH MY GOD!!!!! The beer store is run by Sandies!!!! I will be right back.......................................

Well I know you are Joking.But I'll just let you know I have two kids that are of Persian descent.They are College educated,have 6 figure Jobs.

And I Love them very much and because of this I almost lost my life to three Guys with a Butcher Knife.

big rockpile

Yes we were all joking aroundso are you asking not to postanymore or???????????????????????? Im part native canadian and a high school drop out that makes a 5 figure income,but i laugh at all jokes and stories.

Rockpile, Persians are from Iran not Pakistan. The two countries are not related geographically. For some odd reason I am going to remove the joke becasuse for some odd reason you are offended. If you are offended by the old people jokes, I don't know what to say.

I just dont get it...[X(]....nope......[>:]....CCW works for me if putin that situation.....