First off, the notice anybody other than anti hunters got about this "emergency meeting" was next to nil. Secondly, if I showed up, I don't know how I could possibly not lose my temper dealing with people as misguided as the one that wrote the article below which appeared in our local newspaper last week. Minds are made up, we are monsters, and they are right. Simple as that. Osama Bin Laden feels pretty strongly about his beliefs too, and I'm sure he has no doubt at all that anyone who oposses his beliefs are wrong... Check this out:


Where’s the sport in killing gentle deer?

OK. Let me get right to the point here, for my last ovary is in such an uproar, it's threatening suicide. What kind of people get off on killing harmless and gentle wildlife? I mean, what's that like, I wonder? Do they get rushes of adrenalin? Does it make them feel powerful? Ten feet tall? Well, I'm looking at a picture here of hunters, posing nicely like a group of schoolteachers or advocates for Save The Bay. In fact, they all look pretty darn normal. But then, so did Jack the Ripper. And, to my surprise and disgust, there are women in the group. Oy vey.

The thought of maiming a big eyed doe with a bow and arrow makes me feel nauseated. Who in their right mind could come up with such a heinous plot to cut down on an overpopulation of the most gentle and beautiful animal on God's Earth? The poor deer are accused of overpopulating our land, when in fact, we humans are the carpetbaggers. The deer population is nothing but a smokescreen to justify what the unconscionable call "sport." Those "sports" never search for the starving animal or the sickly animal. They either shoot the whitetail doe at random, or seek out the healthiest buck in order to bring home the finest trophies and the biggest antlers to hang their hat on. What a bloody disgrace. I feel ashamed to call myself a human in this inhumane society.

Of all the positive letters I read addressed to humane societies and town councils, plus listening to one-on-one debates about this high-riding issue, Newport's "Doctor Love" came up with the simplest answer: "Arm the deer!" Arm the deer. Arm the moose. In fact, if I had my way, I'd arm the cows and sheep and the other white meat. Most animals are as defenseless as small children. What easier target to take advantage of?

I mean, what chance does wildlife have against stupid people dressed in silly outfits creeping through the brush, nipping on flasks of bourbon (or a couple of six packs) before becoming bored or impatient or intoxicated. Either way, they will eventually feel obliged to shoot at something; after all, that's what they're out there for. And the first thing that moves could be their neighbor-or their own foot. Occasionally, they'll miss the first thing that moves and shoot a deer or a moose by mistake. (Be prepared to duck starting Nov 8.)

One of my favorite authors, Bill Bryson, a nature lover and animal defender, wrote from his experiences in Maine that shooting a moose was as sportsmanly as shooting a cow.' They're right neighborly," he wrote "and curious moose have been known to walk right up to you." Thus giving Mr. Magoo a chance to stand on his tiptoes and pat it on the snout while drawing a double circle with chalk around its heart. And, by the way, what makes the mighty hunter think he is going to kill one deer with one arrow? Hello, department of delusional thinking, anybody home? That’s more conceit than one person deserves. How many misguided arrows will it take to bring the majestic beast down?

The stress that hunting inflicts on those gentle giants is huge-the noise, the smells, the fear, the constant chase ... imagine it. ("The controlled hunt": It all reminds me of an occupied Poland in 1938, the year I was born.) Stress on a daily basis severely restricts the animal's ability to eat adequately and store the fat and energy it needs to survive the winter. Wild creatures like deer and wolves have close-knit family units, and hunting them down can severely damage entire communities. But hey, no worries. He who stuffs his freezer the fullest of free meat wins.

The whole idea of bringing back the bow and arrow to stalk animals with is impetuous and irresponsible, besides being obviously cruel and unusual punishment. It also reeks of male vanity. Maybe they see themselves dressed up like Robin Hood. Unless they are talking about shooting tranquilizer darts instead of a slow-poisonous arrow, then there has to be another way besides archery. This is one sick idea that should be aborted, and time is of the essence.

The controlled hunt is set to begin in Jamestown-Beavertail, to be exact-on Nov. 8 and run through Jan. 31, 2005. As I said, time is of the essence. Read on, McDuff.

Those special people who claim to love their pets, their cats and dogs with silly names like Sookie and Pooky, may be the same ones who think nothing of picking up a rifle, loading it and shooting a beautiful brown-eyed deer between the eyes, between the shoulder blades or between any other part of its anatomy that shows up on the hunter's high-tech telescopic lenses. What kind of sportsmanship do you call that? And the Yanks think that English foxhunting is barbaric. (It is. But what do you call chasing Bambi with a bow and arrow?)

I couldn't read the article on bow-hunting injuries on deer. I - tried to tell myself it was just research, but then I came to the part about "crippling loss," referring to deer killed but not retrieved, meaning the deer were injured and went underground to die. Others were found wounded and dazed, with arrows sticking out of their legs and their rears.

What can the do to stop this sadistic sport, besides getting hundreds of animal lovers on the days of the hunts to march through the woods ahead of them beating pots and pans?

The other side of the story left me paralyzed with indecision, after speaking with Lori Gibson, supervising wildlife biologist for the state. Holy Fish and Wildlife, that woman can talk! She almost had me believing for a minute that bow hunting is superior to guns and beneficial to the animal’s welfare! I think that the bow hunting benefits are more conclusive to the hunters' welfare than to the hunted's. For the hunter can sneak about with his bow and arrow without alerting the neighborhood. Whereas they are not allowed to shoot a gun within 500 feet of any residence without written permission. Plus, guns going off every five minutes tend to alert the victims that it's that time of year again.

Because I love animals so passionately, I have to admit that I couldn't see the forest for the trees (or should I say, I couldn’t see the trees for the deer). That's because the deer are vegetarian and are guilty of denuding their surrounding vegetation-making the deer problems and the environmental problems one. What else is there for the poor beasts to eat? Gawd, but it's true.

There, are no magic beans and no tranquilizer guns and no vaccination darts to sterilize and keep them from producing. No sharpshooters riding helicopters over the treetops at night with infrared telescopic sights to catalog stampeding herds for future reference. That kind of thing only happens on "Wild Rescues." In real life, sharpshooters reportedly get paid $800 an animal and with millions of deer to tag. Looks like it's back to square one: marching through the woods banging pots and pans.

So those of you who agree with me and with the Humane Society and with the gals at Paws & Claws in Jamestown, call and put in your two cents- or whatever it takes to settle this madness-to the president of the Jamestown Humane Society, David Martin, at 423-0900, or ask for Barbara at Paws & Claws, 423-9677.

It's up to us-not just myself and Ashilin-Margaret Gillis, who helped with this column, and my new best friend, Barbara Szepatowski of Paws & Claws and "Hoofs," but all of us.

Remember, no gut piles are to be deposited near hunting trails or on nicely mowed areas.

Bon appetit and enjoy your venison.
Maggie Gillis Is a Daily News columnist. Her column appears every other week in On the Town.