If she wants a pistol to carry on her I would recommend the Glock Models 23 or 27. Both are .40 caliber and are smaller then the Model 22. I am a law enforcement officer and the 22 is my duty weapon and I have shot both of the other models too. I personally like the Glock because they are a combat handgun and are very simple to operate and clean. I dont think the grip is to thick, I have small hands and they fit around grip find. The recoil can be a bit especially with the smaller guns, I personally didn't switch to the smaller weapons as my duty weapon because of the recoil our duty ammo in them. But then again our duty ammo is not the same stuff you can buy over the counter. You say she is not a stranger to shooting a pistol then she should be able to overcome the recoil issue.

If she wants a gun in the house and not to carry, I would recommend a .410 shotgun. It will take care of business in a house environment and not do much damage as far as going through every wall of the house and possibly endangering others. Just my opinion though.

I wish you the best, I also have had my house broken into during the day and I told the sheriff who responded that luckily I didn't come home during it as somebody would have been leaving in a body bag.