ORIGINAL: TOPDAWGWOOFWOOF

1) never use skoal bandits, only CHEAP fine cut snuff(bandits only for sissies and wimps)
2) like to wear bandannas. they are cooler than hats
3) Have trouble understanding why people wear those sissy pastel pants tofootball games. Just makes you look gay.

Also important to consider -
- Live alone in the woods
- Buy second hand clothes to save money
- Eat ham sandwiches
- Drink cokes
- 16 inch guns
- 320 bench
- 2,000 crunches a day (As I get older the number must increase to keep the abs looking as good as they do)
- Drive a truck with 243, 500 miles on it
- Sit on my porch at night and think about life
- Get very sad when I drive across the country and sleep in the parking lot of a Wal-Mart (or something like it) and remember my youth

I've had a decent run but nothing lasts forever