RE: How far for a 410??
I do agree it would be a very good idea to put a slip on recoil pad on the stock of the 20 gauge.
But if he isn't able to use the 20 and is going to use the 410 make sure you putsome marker stick's out and make sure he understands not to shoot at a bird past them.
I wish you and your son all the luck in your quest.