Things that occur to you in a tree stand
 

Funny what runs through your head when you are in a tree stand waiting for a deer to come along. Below is a link to a story I posted on www.wildramblings.com a while back.

I am always interested in feedback. Here is the link:

http://wildramblings.com/?p=71

Thanks and good hunting to you all.

Wildbill51

"Man, I shouldn't have eaten chili for supper last night...."

"Aaron Rodgers really is that good"

That runs through my head alot

"I shoulda just slept in this morning!"...That happens alot to me haha.

"Wonder what would be left if I shot that squirrel with my 45.70?"

This happend this year..." Shoot I left my wallet at the house!"

Being 18-20 feet in a treestand during deer season is my favorite place to be. While waiting for the opportunity to see a deer, I always appreciate what goes on around me. I see so many things that non-hunters will probably never experience. I have seen and sometimes experienced up close and personal meetings with most/all the animals in my woods. Everything from a small field mouse to a majestic bull moose.

I also play over in my mind what I will do if a deer suddenly appears in a place I don't expect. I tell myself if the deer comes in from behind me, I will do this. If he appears over my left/right shoulder, I will do that. I constantly have a game plan so I'm not caught off guard. It does not always work but at least taking the time to play the situation over and over in my head gives me more confidence.

I always anticipate a shot being fired by one of my buddys. We are all aware where everyone is setup and usually know instantly who fired that shot. Waiting to hear the dead silence of the woods suddenly interrupted by the crack of a 30-06 always brings a smile to my face.

"I forgot the toilet paper...where are some leaves"

happens every friggen time lol

"why am i in this tree..its 19 degree's outside!!!i could be in bed stayin warm with that chick from the bar!!!!"

"i think i spent over 2k this year on deer hunting, that sure woulda made for a nice vacation to hawaii!!"

"man that waitress was hot last nite!!!"(schwing)

I'd like to read it, post it here!

iSnipe

"Wait a minute.....Yep....the wind is changing."

"I wonder if the deer will hear me if I move my stand higher?"

"Do acorns really taste that good?"

"I wish I had Thermal heat sensing scope."

"crunch.....crunch....crunch....Deer?...ahhh...jus t a squirrel"

"Do the animals talk to each other?"

"Figures I just got set up and now I have to ****. Should I go ahead and **** out of my stand??? nope it can wait....dang I gotta go... nope I should wait... yea waiting would be best.... man it's starting to hurt.... they wont know it's human ****.... ahhhahaha that feels sooo much better!!!..............I wish I had waited."

So I figure this is the time of the year that squirells are going into rut due to recent activity and I hear some strange noice in the distance and think...."Man, that squirell really sounds like it's getting raped." I felt bad.

I think this alot...."I bet that button buck would be an easy drag."

"Whoa, that falling leaf made more noise than I'da thought"

"How long can I handle this cramp?"

"How come my nose itches only after I get settled?"

"Why do the leaves always rustle behind me?"

"Will they spook from a fart?"

"Pissless coffee would be fantastic"

I hear a Deer....nope a squirrel...I hear another Deer...nope a squirrel......I hear a Squirrel,not gonna look this time....dangit it was a Deer!


When Cows laugh does milk come out their noses?

If I shot enough squirrels would they would weigh more than a Deer?

I hear another noise...but I'm affraid to make a movement.

Is it alright to Pray to get a Deer?

I wish a Bobcat would walk by...I'd get that baby mounted and I wouldn't have to field dress it!

If I grunt out 'Smoke on the Water' with my flextube will I still attract deer?

"What would bigfoot do?"
"What would I do if BIGFOOT walked by?"
"Shouldn't have eaten that Mickey D's last night!" :spam:

is that snow on the branch above me gonna fall on me?

crunch crunch yes deer.....no squirrel

I wonder whats on tv right now?

if I fart maybe it will sound like a grunt will that big buck come

I knew I should have set up in that other tree. Damn!!

Does this friggen wind EVER stop?

Figures, they come out where I thought, just out of range though. ttt

These woods are like a winter wonderland. I'm lucky!

I like sitting here alone in the quiet, it's the closest thing to real peace that I can find.

I need to throw a squirrel killing party before bow season next year.

I wonder if that porcupine can get me from here?

I wonder if I can make my sniffle sound enough like a wheeze to not blow this hunt?

I wonder how my boss would feel if I took October - December off to hunt?

............I sure hope Tiffany doesn't find my stand and come climb up here with me - again.

"I will have absolutely no way to climb down from this tree, if the bottom half of my API climber falls out beneath me."

This, as Im kneeling down on my seat and pulling the pin out of the chain to readjust at 30 feet up!!!!!:jaw:

STOOOOOOPID!!!

Same here I think about it constantly he really is phenominal he just needs better protection hes so underrated

haha I think about that all the time not that song bu sometimes I get caught up and think about grunting songs

"Why am I out here, I never see any deer?"
"I need a new hobby"
"Ya know I always thought Maryann was hotter than Ginger"
"I could take that squirrel"
"Why did Jimmi Hendrix say excuse me while I kiss this guy?"
"Maybe their all behind me"
" Is Tiger Woods really seeing Jessica Simpson?"
"Time to go, another fruitless hunt:
"Man I can't wait to go again"

"man, backstraps and garlic just may be the perfect combination"

"i wore too many layers, i am hot, a coors original would taste pretty good now"

"crunch, crunch, chew, chew, another squirrel, really?"

this year i couldn't remember an access code for work, i am thinking about it, then it comes to me...its my shotgun, that is the code...awesome, thank you remington!

I wore to many layers Im sweating feel like I just went swimming, O no I have to pee but I hope I can hold it until after dark, crunch crunch its go time O wait no its not its just a squirrel, crunch crunch yes a deer wait no its just another squirrel, is lady gaga a hermaphrodite?, hmmm I wonder how many times my girlfriend is going to try to call me today while im in my stand and leave messages complaining that im not hanging out with her, what if my bottom half of my climber falls Id be pretty screwed, god I hope the farmer doesnt decide to ride the woodline and spread manure rite now, uhh oh I shouldnt have drank that coffee

"I wonder if I can stick this raccoon and not make a sound"

"Nope"

"Why is it no matter what direction I face the wind is still blowing into my face?"

"I wonder what would happen if I tried to jump out of my stand onto this deer"

"How quiet can I **** off my stand?"
"not quietly enough apparently"

"If deer could talk, what would they say?"

Last but not least:

"I knew I should of wore those long underwear; getting drafty"

"I wonder if there are really big bucks out here?"
"I really need to sh!t!"
"I really need to sh!t bad!"
"I cant hold it or I will sh!t my pants"

yep, no deer again.

this sucks

ah man, gotta readjust myself again.

" you gotta be kiddin me... i know I didn't leave my arrows at home"

TRUE STORY

If this was a thread on "things that HAPPENED to me up in a tree stand" I would mention a friend who was sitting quietly when all of a sudden something grabbed his shoulder very roughly. He turned his head to see a huge great horned owl sitting there on his shoulder. He nearly sh*t his pants. :biggrin:

it occurs to me that
 

my butt is numb and I just had a huge deer walk by and I didnt see it.

I wish i could just make all the trees and brush disapear at prime time.

I wish I could clone myself. I wonder what is happening at my other spots? Damn squirrels. I'll show her I can bring home the veni. Stupid grouse. I'm going to kill that mouse. I've got five inches of clothes on and a three inch unit, I hope I don't **** on myself.

If I invented silent velcro, I'd be rich.....

"I wonder what the effects of a 2 3/4" slug would be on that freaking chickadee that won't get away from my stand. . ."

''I wonder what would happen if i shot dat squirrel wit ta 243''Man i gotta P!$$ !''CRUNCH,CRUNCH,CHUNCH,theres a deer,naw,squirrel''******* bluejay,scared everything off in d state of alabama!''I wonder if i could hit 1 a dem geese flyin over my head?''SH!T,my buddy just shot,i hope it aint no big buck!''

Took my 5 year old Grandson with me. After about 30 minutes, "Pop pop, how do all those dead bugs get into the lights?"

"Ok. The smoke from my cigarette is going up. That means the deer wont smell it right?"

We can fish at night with lights, Why don't we hunt at night too. Everyone uses bait for fish but many frown on baiting deer. Is fishing in a lake or pond the same as hunting in an enclosed area? I've been sitting here 3 hours but my watch says 45 minutes. Dang, that bush looks like a deer.

"I've probably spent more time in the woods and seen more sunrises on a frosty morning than most members of PETA."

"God**** squirrel."