Yea, within the first two dates I told my girl/now my wife of 4 years that there were two things that I likes to do, Hunting and go to Talladega. I didn't studder and all is good. Don't Ask Dr. Phil either!

its easy when you aint any good at it, she would definitely keep me home if i gave her that ultimatum

Thanks for all the tips guys. I think we can work it out. She is getting started with some adult rec volleyball leagues which will give her time to do things she likes and that will allow me to do the thing I like-Hunt!

My wife is on board but I can tell she would like me home more often. I think it is because she gets stuck with doing stuff around the house. So I bust my tail after work and after hunting to get work done around the house and she is usually happy. There was a time when I didnt go as much but it was my choice because it was the birth of my wonderful daughter.

Also maybe skip a day or two of hunting during the season and spend an entire day romancing her and make it all about her. That usually works for me.

Yeah, I think you hit it on the head there. As much as many of the guys here are loathe to admit, it's all about compromise. She needs to recognize that you're not going to quit hunting, but you also need to realize that you can't just hunt every day of the week if you're going to contribute to a household, raise kids, etc. I'll readily admit that I'd love to hunt every day during season, but face it...that's asking a lot of a wife and small children. I've found that a happy medium can be reached if you work for it.

A marriage can't survive if it's 100% of the way for one person (whether it be her way or yours). Nobody wants to hear that, it seems, but it's the truth. To those guys that think they can realistically expect it all their way...if you don't like it, don't get married. I've been lucky enough to work out a compromise, so I'm still married. :D I still get to hunt several times a week (and spend a week at camp during peak season), and she's still happy about it.

Hunting is a huge stress relief for me and I won't give it up. If your girlfriend doesn't understand this and you have taken time to explain how important it is to you, and she still doesn't allow you that time....whatever you do, don't marry her. People who can't set aside their wants for their partners wants, are not good partner material, that's the work side of a relationship and it's hard and it really sucks some times, but without it, there is no relationship.

My wife doesn't object to me hunting, and I hunt like *ell come bow season (sun up to sun down some weekdays and every weekend during the rut). I know she doesn't like how much I go, but she understands how important it is to me and since it comes around once a year, she gives me that time. Just as I give her the time she needs with her girlfriends and shopping and I will do special things for her during the season as a way to say thank you for allowing me my time. One thing she really likes is when I stop by Dunkin Donuts on the way home with her favorite coffee, doesn't cost much, it just shows that I was thinking about her.

It's all about giving and taking to make it work.

I know I'm going to catch hell for saying this, but to all the guys that say hunt no matter what...it's one thing to get an adult woman to understand you being gone a lot, but how do you rationalize that to a 3-year old that wants to spend some time with Dad? I'm not saying you should give in and totally quit hunting, but you can't completely disown your family for 2 months either. Just saying you have to be reasonable in what you're asking of your family. Most guys know that balance, but I know a few that are, well, basically selfish asses about spending all of the season hunting.

Especially when it comes to your kids. Kids are only little for so long...once that time is gone, it's gone. At least when they're a little older you can spend a lot more quality time hunting with them. Hard to do when they're only 2 or 3 though.

Miss Ball State....
 

My girlfriend at the time became Miss Ball State and I walked out on her.

She made me choose, hunting/fishing......I said queitly back, "Ive hunted and fished all my life and only dated you 8 months'.....then I walked out crying my eyes out, got drunk for 2 days straight. Now, Im married and hunt whenever I want and happy!

Oh, divorced too, she liked it at first...4+years and going awesome with the 2nd.....

My point, if you feell guilty going hunting/fishing your not enjoying yourself!

Soot, you guys think you got it bad??????
 

I can't keep the "better half" OUT of my best stands. Sheesh! :bash:

LMAO. My wife sites where I put her..lol... But I try and put her in the best spot as she doesn't get much of a chance to go out with her working full time and college.

You made a good, honest decision on the first girlfriend.

In general, women never change and they have to be truthful whether or not they are willing to live with the hunting. I had the same problems in my marriage while I restored cars. Then it started with the hunting. Now, I am divorced and as happy as I have ever been. Problem was, I did not hunt nearly as much as my friends, bu when I did - all hell broke loose. It is all about respecting each others' time.

The bottom line is to tell a woman this is what you like to do, and if you do not like it then you might need to reconsider another mate. As simple as that. An earlier poster mentioned that women will try to change you...he is so right.

you are a wise man, made her realize that she wanted what you wanted. lol

mmm635,

You hit the nail on the head. You will not change a woman's mind. A person can change but.........if they dont like it at first, well....

Good luck to all, like I said, I walked out on a potential Miss Indiana and thought I could make it on my first marriage. It just doesnt work.

I like to hunt and not worry about what time I have to be home, is she going to be mad, I'd had 2 hrs to hunt and SO she has 2 hrs to leave and go shopping.

Life is a compromise, but not feeling guilty to going hunting is PRICELESS..................

Someone wise once said “Men marry women thinking they WON’T change. Women marry men think they WILL change.”

The truth is, people DO change. People change on their own and people change because of the people in their life. It’s part of growing. Life doesn’t stand still. But people don’t change who they are in a basic sense. Any true, lasting relationship requires some compromise and appreciation of each other for who they are, not who you want them to be. The key is honesty, so that you know who each other really are, commitment, because there will be rough patches and disagreements, and effective communication to let the other person know where you are coming from and avoid misunderstandings (more communication is not always better, but a certain minimum is necessary).

It sounds like you are addressing the issue in a positive way, with compromise, communication and respect. As others have said: She should love who you are in a basic sense, at your core. Let her know that hunting is part of what makes you who you are, and that you’re not willing to let it go, and that, if you did, you would change who you are in a basic sense. And she doesn’t want THAT, does she? If she does, then you’re not right for each other.

Good luck with this gal (or the next one, if this one doesn't work out)!

Well call me a jerk, But most women try that its a matter of control, I basically told my wife 2 things when we met and she said she didn't want me to hunt or fish.
One I am Not going to stop doing what I have been since I was a kid,
and second I can go hunting and fishing to stay out of trouble or goto the bar and hang out with my buddies and get in to posible trouble. try to bring her thats what I do now or find her a hobby to keep her busy when your out doing your thing everyone needs there own space, otherwise you might as well give all your equipment away and follow her Around like a puppy dog
whats it going to Be ???
Best of Luck

My girlfriend gripes because she is too busy with nursing school to be able to hunt much right now. That's her only complaint. :biggrin:

Hunting or a girl? What do you love more? Cause you cant have both :-)

Thats not true at all.

I am pretty lucky. My GF is really supportive, or at least indifferent. Not indifferent in a bad, she has things that she enjoys doing and she doesn't need me there 24 hours a day She knows that from September till May I am going to be hard to find. But she loves to sunbathe while I fish, so thats nice ;)

After reading some of these post from you guys, I really realize how fortunate I really am. Early on my wife realized there was no way she would get me to cut back on my time in the woods and swamp, so she took an interest in it. She loved the fishing part of it, but at that time didn't really car for the deer hunting because it was so cold. Turkey hunting became a passion for her, so much so that she went to work for the NWTF and The Women in the Outdoors program for 10 years. We don't fish near as much as we used to because of our line of work but when bow season is here, there isn't a night that goes by that one or both of us are not in a stand. We have game and fish mounts on just about every wall in the house. Yes, I am truly blessed to have a bride of 25 years like her.

Agreed. Find yourself a woman that loves to hunt. Then you only have to fight over who gets the better stands. ;)

Excellent post, py!!!!
 

Couldn't have said it better myself.. Sharing the dream of your own place, working together to achieve it, then working together to make it what you dreamed, life doesn't get any better than that!!! She's my best friend also!!! These guys have no idea what they're missing. There have been days in a heated ground blind in DEC, I will never forget! :party0005:

I got my wife into hunting.

I have the same problem with my wife. I work with her though. I try not to let it run my life. i understand she my life too. So it's not fair if i say deal with it. I you care about her you are gonna have to comprimise with her. Ur call good luck.

Definately a red flag i guess i'm lucky but my girlfriend enjoys doing anything outdoors. A relationship shouldnt keep you from enjoying something you love. I love my girlfriend to death and i couldnt live without her but if she tried to cut off my hunting time, we'd have a problem lol. Just sit down with her and discuss that she's gonna have to except it or meet you in the middle

All you guys who tell your wives..."Hey...I hunt. That's the way it's gonna be. And, if you don't like it, so what"......................

We need to see pics of your wives. It'll make more sense if we see what's at stake.

LOL That is hilarious.....But true

I second that.......LMAO

Everything in life is about balance.

I know guys who shove everything aside to hunt. Litterly, work, kids, wifes, mother, whatever. They are out 4 days a week or more 3 months straight. They pay the price for it.

To me, thats unhealthy. I hunt probably too much. Two days a week from Oct 15 to Dec. 7.

Amen to that. You wouldn't want to invest all of your money in one stock. Same goes with your time and effort. I love to hunt, but it's healthy to have other interests and relationships. What if you got hurt and could never hunt again, or, God forbid, developed an allergy to deer! Passion is one thing. Obsession is another. Passion is healthy, IMHO, but I don't think obsession is, when it keeps everything else out of your life.

Now that right there is funny.....:D

Sounds like control problems!! This is what I do and It works out great. I do everything around the house, yard work, water the flowers, cook dinner, even do the dishes and laundry. I don't ask for help I just do it. I even get the "honey do" list done. I ask her if she wants to go with me to check camera's, go fishing, grab some firewood, whatever. She does most of the time. Its the thought that counts. When I tell her that Im going hunting or whatever, she just wants a text message sometime to let her know everything is going alright. I figure if I get everything done, spend time with her, there is no reason she has to complain. So far it has worked. That's my girl though, I don't know about yours.

With marriage and children it will get WAY worse. My wife puts up with my hunting but doesn’t like it. I gave up fishing since it was not a passion like hunting is and that helped. I only liked fished for something to pass the time but love hunting and will do it until I’m in a wheelchair. When we had kids I slowed down my hunting from 5-7 days a week to 3-5 because I wanted to spend more time with my kids.

Bottom line if you are a passionate hunter and she can’t deal with it she can’t deal with you. I don’t know your situation but if it is that important to you and you are not going to give it up you would be better giving her up before getting married and having kids. My brother could not afford to hunt for the 1st two years after his divorce due to all the CHILD SUPPORT he had to pay. You might save yourself some heartache by breaking it off now.

My wife would never think of taking my hunting away. She respects my wishes and I do hers. She even helps cut the deer up... Not to toot my own horn, by I have a great wife that lets me do what ever I want. She even packs my snacks for hunting. She will have dinner ready when I get home too... Its all about respect, give and you will receive.....

WHAMMMMM!!!! Man that's like getting smacked in the face with the Frying pan. My wife is fine with me and our son hunting, sometimes she pushes out the door. I always get the last word in when she tells me and dj to go fishing or hunting. ( Yes Dear) Ha ha ha ha. If that would ever try to change I know what i would do. Get her involved buy her a bow, do some 3D shoots she might like it.

I told my wife now of 4 years to get used to it. She is now ready to accept me taking a long extend trip,lol.
We have a two year old daughter now as well. I let her go to year round swimming with the baby every Saturday at 9am. She gets her way, and I get mine:barmy:
We usually get an October wedding invitation to screw up the season as well.

I guess I'm passionately Obsessed then :rock: