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Near Death Experience. (worth a read)

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Near Death Experience. (worth a read)

Old 02-02-2009, 08:34 PM
Nontypical Buck
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Default Near Death Experience. (worth a read)

The night blankets the land sparing nothing. No moon tonight, nothing to illuminate the woods even for an instance. I click and click on my flashlight to no avail. Should have changed the batteries I thought to myself as I began my decent to the forest floor. Adrenaline pumping. This is one cool cat who hates the dark. Especially without a flashlight. Its been 90 all day and now its dropping faster and faster. the cold starts to creep in and Im begining to question my decision to opt for the ventelated shirt for the evening hunt. The thicket behind me creeps up in the back of my mind and it makes a tough time even tougher. The time spent tonight will not be forgotten.

I get to the bottom of the tree finally and I unhook my harness and mumble to myself a song or two to try to take the edge off of my school girl mentality about the dark. Keep telling myself that theres nothing thats going to hurt me here and theres nothing to be afraid of. Yeah like that helped even for a second. Thats the thing about lying to yourself You always know what the truth really is. Finally I reach the forest floor, and I begin to put things in my pack as I prepare to unhook my treestand. Hearts pouding so loud I cant hear out of my bad ear anymore. Talk about being deaf scared and slightly blind?

Trying to think positive now becomes impossable. I'm only 800 yards from my house. I'll be fine. Just keep saying that over and over and maybe you'll believe it. The treestand is a pain and i strugle to detach it in the dark, Finally i get it off the tree and onto my back. I attach my fanny pack and away I go, bow in hand Heart throbbing. Then it happens. Like an explosion the thicket erupts on my bad ear side, ofcoarse, and I let out a scream that would make a girl scout giggle were talking one leg in the air one hand on the man area and bow infront of my face I look like the #4 in my current position. I about have a heart attack and I was thanking my lucky stars that I wore that second set of undies. I sneak down the trail in the pitch black saying to myself I dont see a deer the entire time im in the tree but soon as i get on the ground where im not comfortable i'm bound to see one. I edge down the trail looking like Ray Charles walking through a mine field. The darkness creeps back in and the eerie scilence of my ear ringing is getting old. I get closer to the pond Sweating like a champ stinking like what happened in my pants and I can start to hear the peepers making their noise.... Then it happens

Out of the grass it erupts right infront of me. My biggest fear is on me right now, I can see the hunger in his eyes and he is mad, its fear that grips me now, I see my life flash before my eyes, I dropped my bow dancing around frantically screaming like a school girl its pure terror mode and utter chaos Im panicing What if it bites me?? Im too far from my house to crawl the entire way back. I cant get it off.... the treestand goes flying, Im starting to shed clothes to try to see if it will just take the clothes rather than me. The dance is still taking place and Im screaming like a child its soo dark I cant tell if its still there or not Im swatting all over myself trying to keep it back from me... I stop as I realize it just took my shirt... breathing heavily now I try to catch my breath and compose myself its freezing now because of the sweat and being topless.

I gather my things and head the rest of the way home. I found my shirt and refused to put it back on after my ordeal incase it was still lurking nearby. I Was lucky to survive the encounter with my biggest fear. The cricket.

(hope you got a laugh out of that I about peed myself when the deer took off through the woods infront of me. I was just glad noone cought that on film cause my position was rediculiously funny. It was freakin dark that night too. I am deathly afraid of crickets/grasshoppers and if one lands on me forget it. So lets hear your stories aswell.

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Old 02-02-2009, 08:54 PM
Nontypical Buck
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Default RE: Near Death Experience. (worth a read)

Ohh I forgot to mention I want to be an outdoor writer someday, so beyond my horrific spelling what do you guys think about my storytelling ability? I'm having an off night that was one of my lesser stories. I appericiate it.

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Old 02-02-2009, 09:05 PM
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Default RE: Near Death Experience. (worth a read)

Good story, made me laugh.
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Old 02-02-2009, 09:08 PM
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Default RE: Near Death Experience. (worth a read)

I think it was really well written. You had my attention the whole time and that's a good quality in writting.
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Old 02-02-2009, 09:13 PM
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Default RE: Near Death Experience. (worth a read)

Good one! Made me laugh! I'm the same way, (except not with crickets,I still like to catch them and play with them for some reason) only with spiders.

Nothing worse in my opinion then walking the woods in the day or night and walking into a HUGE spider web and then feeling it crawling on your face! I usually flip like a little school girl and do anything I can to get that nasty sucker off my face! YUCK!!!
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Old 02-02-2009, 09:15 PM
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Default RE: Near Death Experience. (worth a read)

Good story!
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Old 02-02-2009, 09:16 PM
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Default RE: Near Death Experience. (worth a read)

That was hilarious. That has happened to me a few times before, lol.
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Old 02-02-2009, 09:34 PM
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Old 02-03-2009, 03:18 AM
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Default RE: Near Death Experience. (worth a read)

Good story Ryan. Keep up the good work and you will be an outdoor writer someday...
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Old 02-03-2009, 04:10 AM
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Default RE: Near Death Experience. (worth a read)

Wow great story!!! That is me in a nut shell with spiders!!! Man I hate spiders and if one gets on me look out the death run is on.. Walt
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