I would suggest that the problem isn't with the bullets performance but with what you want it to look like.
I would agree that we all want to see the bullet hold up and not come apart, but it's hard to argue with your success isn't it?
You might find that some bullets that hold up better won't deform as much and therefore you'll have less traumatic tissue damage than the ones that do a little "blowin up"
I have felt the same way about my .243 with the 100 gr Cor-loct and Silvertips I've used. But the deer die pretty quick, even some of the big ones ...even when I've had trouble finding chunks of bullet.
I think you can find something that will do what you ask and still kill the deer quite well. But they might not die any faster.