Man I hear ya s. il.! I do.

Every show, magazine cover, video, news story, t-shirt, belt, belt buckle, hat, pin, bumper sticker, window decal, product, etc. Heck even our money! ("Hey buddy, can ya spare a BUCK?")

Buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck!

Will the new Remington "BuckHammer" slugs work on does? I mean is it even legal (or ethical, moral, politically correct or socially acceptable) to fire these savages at a doe? Or are they just STRICTLY FOR BUCKS!

I heard Ithaca is bringing out with a new pump shotgun. It's going to be a super modified version of their legendary pump and it's made of Kryptonite along with other top secret and classified materials! It's going to be called "BUCKSLAYER"! So technologically advanced that if you point it at anything other than a BUCK it won't fire. It's limited by an internal "selective fire, reputaion enhancement" computer system. And then there is "BUCKSLAYER EXTREME", it has the same "selective fire, reputation enhancement" control and it will not fire unless it is pointed at a 175 class BUCK or better. The computer does all the calculations internally, no matter how many points, it automatically calculates the score. 20-point BUCK, alright! Fork BUCK with 4-foot spread and 8-inch thick beams, good deal! Even a unicorn BUCK with an radio tower is no problem for the BUCKSLAYER EXTREME! Call now and you'll get a free (you guessed it!) "Ultimate BUCK Gutter" knife. From a**hole to windpipe the "Ultimate BUCK Gutter" does it all in a single swipe, better than any other blade on the market, it's gotta be the best, afterall it is THE one, THE only............."Ultimate BUCK Gutter"! Able to gut and butcher your buck in a single swipe, in every hunter's favorite style of butcher ..................
.........THE BUCK CUT!

And let's not forget Ladies and Gentlemen, uh, I mean BUCK hunters -
THE MORE YOU USE IT THE SHARPER IT GETS!

DISCLAIMER/NOTE: The "Ultimate BUCK Gutter" knife is shipped dull, with absolutely no edge whatsoever and without a sheath. When you receive your "Ultimate BUCK Gutter" knive just simply start trying to cut any available scrap material such as carbide, stainless steel or cobalt and the lifetime edge will develop immediately. If you can find a sheath to carry it in, that the "Ultimate BUCK Gutter will not simply cut itself out of after developing an edge-GOOD LUCK!

In a woodland exit poll 84% of the does surveyed wanted to grow up to be, or thought they actually were, BUCKS! Many actually verbally expressed feeling that they were somehow BUCKS born in a female deer body. Even physotherapy could not help these poor, misguided animals.

Hey, seriously though, I'm a S. IL boy, too. Family is from Marion, Williamson County. Where you at?

Uncle BUCK, uh, I mean Uncle Matt (in IL)