I would suggest a Ruger KP-89 or KP-95 9mm.

Depending on whether it fits your hand or not, I'd suggest the P-95 as the first alternative: The KP-95 is a stainless slide on a polymer frame, 9mm manual safety DA/SA semiauto pistol it can be viewed here:

http://www.ruger.com/Firearms/FAProd...=3094&return=Y

Having a stainless slide and polymer frame makes this thing pretty easy to maintain, most gals I've helped start shooting weren't really tickled about cleaning their guns, this combo gives you a litte leeway in that area. The polymer frame and Steel slide combination leads to a gun that is balanced above the hand and towards the muzzle. This is good for new shooters, especially recoil sensitive women, it turns recoil into rotation instead of straight back into your hand, however, since it is balanced towards the muzzle (especially with an empty mag), muzzle control is simple. When you're emptying a mag in a hurry, this thing gets more and more balanced to the muzzle, so it helps you control your muzzle during "rapid fire".

The P-89 is basically the same gun, just in a steel gripframe. It doesn't balance the same as the polymer/steel combo, but it's quite nice on recoil anyway.

Ruger pistols are bombproof, and you'll not regret buying one. They're relatively cheap as well, I bought my last P-series gun (KP-97DC .45acp) for $318