Something along the lines of a short barreled .357 like a Ruger SP-101 makes a very good defense gun. Use some very light rounds intended for defense loads like Defender MagSafe. These rounds will disentigrate in sheet rock, avoiding dangerous over penetration problems associated with some of the other handgun rounds.
You took the words right out of my mouth. A well-maintained revolver is dependable 100% of the time, which personally is a requirement for any self-defense weapon. My wife and I both prefer the .357 Magnum as a self-defense cartridge, and we never have to worry about jams. The Ruger SP and GP lines are a good place to start looking if you're interested.
If you'd prefer an auto, check out theSteyr M40 pistol. It's a great gun for the money, and you can buy 9mm (M9) and .40S&W models. It tends to fit different people very well, the barrel sits low in the slide for good balance, plus it ships with triangle/trapezoid sights that tend to line up faster than three dots (after some practice at the range).
The M40 can be picky about ammo, though. I've had bad jamming experiences with Remington UMC and other cheap ammo brands. If you do decide to get one, stick with Federal and Winchester.