RE: most accurate 9mm
Hi ugly dog,
Does your wife have any experience shooting handguns at all? You might want to give her a try on one of your .45's. (Actually a single stack magazine in .45 tends to fit smaller hands better than double-stacked 9's.) I've known quite a few women that have no trouble at all......handling a .45.
If she hasn't had any, or very little, experience shooting handguns.....you might want to consider a decent .22LR pistol. A good rimfire pistol can be had for about half or so of a good centerfire pistol....provides a lot of cheap non-intiminating practice.....and from that your wife might make a transition very easily to a .45.
If you'd just like to pick up a nine for the sake of having one....the Ruger and Taurus offer a lot for the money!
Good luck on your decision!
Dave