I might be a little late but i wanted to give you a womans perspective.

First I am 116 lbs, I have very weak wrists and small hands and I shoot the Taurus Millenium Pro 9mm. its a 12+1, has a Loaded Chamber Indicator, is slim enough for me to use with one hand (ejecting clip, turning safety on & off etc). Because it does hold 12+1 it adds just enough weight so that there is hardly any recoil. Its a very smooth action gun and I love it.

Hope that helps. Also if you have an Academy anywhere around you they tend to have them on sall efor $299 - not too bad.

Good luck finding ammo though