Heres one...

A preacher walks by a little boy shaking a big bottle of turpentine. The preacher asks, hey whatcha doing? The little boy says I'm shaking the most powerful liquid in the world! The preacher tells him no son, holy water is the most powerful liquid in the world. Why, you can rub it on a pregnant woman's stomach and she will pass a healthy baby boy every time! What do you say to that? The little boy replies, well you can rub this on a cat's a$$and it'll pass a damn motorcycle!