First of all, thanks for serving and stay safe. I've been a police firearms trainer for over 13 years and have had the opportunity to train quite a few females. We use the Glock .40 claiber pistols and to date, every single female has qualified with either a Glock 22 or Glock 23 (both in .40 caliber). You can get the subcompact model (Glock 27) but it has a short pistol grip and most people end up attaching a mag extender to get a better grip.

The Glock pistols have double stack magazines but our 5-5, 100 #'s dripping wet females do shoot them and qualify. With the Glock, the actual shooting platform is lower and a shooter tends to handle the recoil better. I've owned and shot Glock 9mm's and .40 caliber pistols and there really isn't a lot of difference in recoil but there is a huge difference in terminal ballistics.

The Glocks have what is called a safe action, meaning that the pistol is "cocked and locked" but a lot safer than a traditional M1911. The pistol doesn't have a magazine disconnect safety like the S&W's and all of the pistols carry 2-3 times the # of rounds in a standard revolver.

If you are unable to wait till after you get back from Afghanistan and have to purchase a pistol (or revolver) from overseas, you should consider purchasing something you would like to have in case your wife decides she wants something different. Hope this helps some. Semper Fi!