I have a barrel of dynomite in my basement that can be detonated by remote...when someone breaks into my house i gather everyone up and we hop out the window....once weget outside at a safe distancethe kids count down 3...2...1 and i press little red button on small black remote and........



the boy and mewait for daylightto search for human remains....while HoneyDewmakes phonecalls to the insurance company.

meanwhile we found some body parts in our search...



it was 3 blocks away inthe middle of the street.....it was a pretty powerfull blast

turns out it was just a whale from the local Aquarium that Wandered off in search of food after a late night doobie, and thought our fridge might have a tastey treat for him.

one eye witness knownas"CrazyDave" made a911 call from his room atSmellyPines nursing home and stated thathe waslookingout the windowata full moon when he seen What appeared to be a Whale fly by.

Theyupped the dose of ''Crazy Daves" medication the next morning after he swore to the Nurse about what he saw...

now hesbeen relocatedfrom the nursing home to the NutHouse and his only friend is a strait jacket named "Clyde".