I think alot of it depends. I hunt where we don't have to worry about things like this, just the game laws. I mean if someone owns like 50 Acres of land and knows of one big buck out there that he's been hunting, it's a lot different than if someone owns 400 acres and is asking you not to shoot any of the big bucks that are walking around. I personally would not ask someone to hunt on my land and expect them not to shoot something that I would. My uncles who spend a lot of time managing their deer don't ask that of me (but I'm also responsible enough not to be shooting any small forkhorns either). I wouldn't necessarily decline the invitation, but it's not the way I think it should be done.

As far as asking someone out for a doe hunt, if everyone's hunting does then it very reasonable to expect someone not to shoot a buck, but to ask someone to come out and shoot does while everyone else is buck hunting isn't. Most of our "doe hunts" are in doe only season though, so we don't have much problems with that. I don't know how the rest of your states are.