ORIGINAL: GMMAT

I've been eating these for weeks, now. I also have limited my diet to tree bark, indigenous plants to my hunting area and small insects. I drink only water from the creek that runs through the woods I hunt......but will occasionally squeeze the nectar from a persimmon or two for a change.

I am bathing in the pond across the street......using soaps derived from pine cone extract. My clothes have been hermetically sealed in dirt and dried berry vines since Last December.....and my treestands are vacuum sealed in bags containing only organic fauna.

As we speak.....I'm at my office desk in a bubble containing sparrow dander; an old squirrel's nest and the essence of tick. I am also on a tink's 69 I.V. drip.

I am set to kill a good buck this year.....but I haven'tgotten laid in a month.