I think both sides are splitting hairs a little too fine. Sometimes the deer drops in its tracks. Sometimes they run a ways. I have read that if you hit a deer through the shoulder blades, the shock of bullet on bone usually knocks them down long enough for the damage to the vitals to kill them. I don't think you can rely on this. If you break both shoulders it is pretty tough for them to run away, but they can sometimes do surprising things.

A deer shot through both lungs is a dead deer, and if there is an exit hole, usually it will leave enough blood a blind man can follow it. It will be rare that deer hit this way will go more than a hundred yards.

Coyote hunters who are after fur prefer not to have an exit hole. Deer hunters might be concerned with meat damage, but that is more a factor of where you hit them. I don't see any other reason why you wouldn't want an exit hole. If you want to expend 500 foot pounds in a deer hit it with 1000. If you want to expend 500 in the deer and only hit it with 500, then you are cutting it too fine. There is no reason to try to be efficient with bullet energy.

On the other side, this doesn't mean you need an ultra mag. If the bullet isn't exiting, get one with firmer contruction. If it is only making a pencil hole all the way through, you need to push it faster so it opens up more, or get one that opens up better.