This being your first handgun why not go with the easy to use Glock ? It doesn't have a manual safety or decocking lever..... If there is even a remote chance it will be used for self defence it would be the semi-auto of choice for a first gun. Pick it up, pull the trigger and bang. Nothing to confuse you. As far as them being safe, look at what many cops carry. You can get a police turn in for around $300.00 in 9mm. As stated above, if you can go to the range and rent a few to try that would be the ticket. There are several semi-autos out there that are well made. I'm not a 9mm fan but thats just me. I like the 45ACP.