RE: My consience is killing me (really long)
You did all you could after the shot. Don't be so hard on yourself. The deer is still alive or you would have found him by now.
It was a tough shot. It sounds like you rushed the shot a bit after you stopped him. It also didn't help that he was 5 yards past your limit of 30 yards.
I did the exact same thing 2 weeks ago. Biggest buck of my life at 35 yards. My limit was 30. I stopped him between 2 trees with a mouth grunt and had to shoot quick (I probably had more time than I thought). I gutshot him and found him 2 days later. My point is that's a tough shot under those circumstances. I can make that shot but I definitely rushed it thinking the deer was about to bolt.
Good luck on the rest of your season. Don't let this ruin your season.