Set my alarm last nite, all gung-ho to get up this morning and hunt for an hour or so before work. In fact, I planned on hunting almost every morning before work, and really hit it hard the last 2 weeks of PA season. Alarm went off, I threw it on the floor, and then asked myself "WHY should I go hunting this morning.??" It became apparant to me that getting up at 6am to go work was a lot more appealing than getting up at 4 and spending another morning chasing around a bird. I haven't pulled the trigger on a bird since May of 2002. That's a long time to me. When I first started in 1995, I had a blast; taking 4 birds in 5 years, then calling off for a couple years for a new job. Started in 2002 again, and bam, took one the first 15 minutes in the woods. I loved it. Back then, it all worked. Set up on them at the roost, they fly down, come to the call, bang. It didn't work every time, but enough to fill a tag and keep me going. Nowadays, it's been nothing but an exercise in futility. It doesn't work none of time. Frustration, anger, humiliation and disgust have all taken a toll on me. I have absolutely no confidence when it comes to this sport anymore. No matter what tactic I apply, no matter how I call, if I call at all, no matter where I set up, they just don't come my way. No matter how many scouting days I spend watching them roost here or there and fly down to whereever, the day I set up, just happens to be the day they change their patterns. I'm not even learning anything anymore; how can I learn something when they do something different everyday - no matter which piece of woods I'm in? Preparation, patience, planning, perseverence..........none have paid off. I used to smile when I heard that first gobble of the morning while sitting under a tree........now I think "yea right." I know this is a test; whether given by Mother Nature, God, or some other force that I cannot comprehend...........and I know that I'm failing miserably. I used to love this sport. But with 24 unsuccessful mornings in 3 seasons, the love is gone. I just want it to be fun again. That's all. I don't have to pull the trigger. I just want one to walk by. The white flag is in my hand, whether I wave it or not, only the time I spend in the next 2 weeks will tell. If I can get out of bed......

Sorry for the rant. But I don't have anyone to talk to at work or home about turkeys; and I just wanted to put my thoughts in writing here so someday, if I do stay with it and succeed again, I can find this post and remind myself of how low one can get when success avoids them........then I'll delete it.