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> > > >Subject: Fw: Jeff Foxworthy's view of Michigan
> > > >
> > > >If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling
through 18
> > > >inches
> > > >of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim
by,
you
> > > >might live in Michigan
> > > >
> > > >If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96
nights
each
> > > >year
> > > >because Pelston (or Amasa) is the coldest spot in the nation,
you
might
> > > >live
> > > >in Michigan
> > > >
> > > >If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through
March, you
> might
> > > >live in Michigan
> > > >
> > > >If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of
the
> year,
> > > >you might live in Michigan.
> > > >
> > > >If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't
work
there,
> you
> > > >might live in Michigan
> > > >
> > > >If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle
of his
> > > >forehead, you might live in Michigan
> > > >
> > > >If you have worn shorts and a coat at the same time, you might
live
in
> > > >Michigan
> > > >
> > > >If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you
might live
> in
> > > >Michigan
> > > >
> > > >If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone
who
> dialed a
> > > >wrong number, you might live in Michigan
> > > >
> > > >You know you're a true MICHIGANDER when............
> > > >
> > > >1. "Vacation" means going up north on I-75.
> > > >
> > > >2. You measure distance in hours.
> > > >
> > > >3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
> > > >
> > > >4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
> > > >
> > > >5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging
> blizzard,
> > > >without flinching.
> > > >
> > > >6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events
(including
> weddings).
> > > >
> > > >7. You install security lights on your house and garage and
leave
both
> > > >unlocked.
> > > >
> > > >8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend
knows how
to
> use
> > > >them.
> > > >
> > > >9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a
snowsuit.
> > > >
> > > >10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are
filled
> with
> > > >snow.
> > > >
> > > >11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter
and
> road
> > > >construction.
> > > >
> > > >12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
> > > >
> > > >13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer
next to
> your
> > > >blue spruce.
> > > >
> > > >14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.
> > > >
> > > >15. Down South to you means Ohio
> > > >
> > > >16. A brat is something you eat.
> > > >
> > > >17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole
shed.

18. You go out to fish fry every Friday.
>
19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.

20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

21. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly."

22. You drink pop and bake with soda.

23. Your doctor tells you to drink Vernors and you know it's
not
> midicene
24. You know what a yooper is.

25. You think owning a Honda is Un American.

26. You know that UP is a place not a direction
27. You know it's possible to live in a thumb.

28. You understand that when visiting Detroit, the best thing
to wear is a Kevlar vest.

29. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them
to all your Michigan friends