Allen Denton

Well he is a great kid and he gets very good grades. He is in 3rd grade and his teacher has a card system for those who need to change their behavior. Here lately he has been changing a card, only one, daily. My wife wants to use hunting as a tool to get him to not change a card. She wants a card turned a day off hunting. I think that he needs time to change the behavior and that is a bit harsh. Has anyone else had a good kid that just talked a little too much. He is shooting every Fri. night at the gun club with .22 and is now a NRA Bar 3 sharpshooter. He is looking forward to deer season and so am I.

bigpapa

I would agree with your wife. It won't damage his life to not go hunting and it puts a consequence to his actions. It will allow him to learn that his behavior has a direct relationship with his privileges at home. As my wife has pointed out to me once or twice. We as fathers and outdoorsmen should not allow our willingness to share this love with our children to undermine our responsibility to discipline them. In the summer I take my son fishing almost every morning. However, when he does something wrong he can't go. Sometimes that means I can't go and that sucks. But its better having a consequence for his behavior than him thinking he can do whatever and still get to go fishing with daddy.Being a father is by far the hardest job on earth but it is also one of the most rewarding. Good luck with whichever decision you make.

Warren

Allen

bigpapa has some good point
I had a son who was a troubled teen.
My advice- make sure you and your wife are in agreement. You will need to work as a team and stay firm and not send mixed signals to you son. Show him that you love him and you are his father first and his friend second. This will be more important as he gets older.
With that said, having him miss thedeer seasonmayalso ruin the season for you. There is only one opening day. Maybe having him miss a few friday night shoots would be a compromise.
Sounds like you have a good kid, I hope he stays that way.

swamp rooster

3rd grade,,come on ,,leave the boy alone ,,let him hunt when ever he wants to go,,sounds like hes heading in the right direction ,with his shooting and love of guns,,want be long he will be out shooting his ol man,if hes not already.

wis_bow_huntr

Ive ran into the same issue as you with my son. Hes now 9 and has ADD. He enjoys hunting with me and it breaks my heart when he gets in trouble and i have to tell well you lost this privlidge and this and so on....he gets so angry he starts saying I hate you mom and dad, stomps into his room and slams the door crying and throwing his fit. We have grown to deal with it, let him calm down and sit and talk with him about his behavior. Hes a wonderfulkid and we love him with all our hearts but a punishment is no good if you dont follow through with it. Be strong on your decision no matter what one you make. Make sure its the right one. Id agree, id take a few nites away from his shooting at the gun club. Hunting with dad is way to important to miss any chance. Take that time hunting to talk to him about his behavior in school, hes not going to go anywhere. Good luck.

RugerM77.270

It sounds like he likes hunting but you like hunting with him more.

I'm a youth pastor and I will tell you that kids these days need to know that there are results totheir actions. And it has to start early. With the 50 some odd kids that I have the best ones are the ones with the strictist parents.Stick to your guns even if it hurts you not having your son hunting with you, your sacrifice will be getter for himin the long run.

bigpapa

Swamp,
Your way off base here. If you just let him go he's only in 3rd grade then you're telling him that there are no consequincs to his actions due to his age. My 4 year old has consequincs for his actions and he understands good and bad choices. So, whenwould you sayhe should learn to behave properly? When he is in prison??? Kicked out of school??? Has a criminal reccord??? Then will you say "let the kid off he's only a teenager he shouldnt be held accountable."? Accountability for ones actions start at a very young age. Allen, go hunting on opening day. Leave your son at home. Don't think twice about it. When you get home with a deer tell him all about your hunt and remind him that had he made propper decisions he would have been there with you. LikeWarren said "Show him that you love him and you are his father first and his friend second."

Allen Denton

This is what I wanted, those of you who have gone through this before. I really want him to do good and I guess i am being selfish that I want him to hunt with me. I guess that I will wait until after his conference today. We had a good night and i think that he is playing the teachers system. Turning one card has zero circomstances and he is smart enough that he does not turn more then one card. Thanks for the input.

Allen Denton

This is what I wanted, those of you who have gone through this before. I really want him to do good and I guess i am being selfish that I want him to hunt with me. I guess that I will wait until after his conference today. We had a good night and i think that he is playing the teachers system. Turning one card has zero circomstances and he is smart enough that he does not turn more then one card. Thanks for the input.

bigpapa

Dude, being a father is soooooo hard. My son test's all the time to see what he can and can't get away with. I hate making him miss out on things but tough love. Hang in there you'll get it all figured out. He may not like it but he will respect you for it.