bawanajim

Maybe you could point out the benefits of abandonment ,is it the out of sight out of mind theory?
Go back and this time read my posts READ the parts where I explain punishments and how important they are.
And the parts where I wrote do as you like but in my mind you are the fool who feels that the hands off approach is the best.And by hands off I mean that you think leaving your kid home as punishment instead of taking him with you to help correct his short comings.
Yea I'm sure he will want to grow up just like you hunting alone.

fillae

Kids, at a very early age are searching for their boundaries. Kids that have trouble are those whose parents have not set those boundaries. It's a constant battle because of outside influences, such as friends who have parents that are more liberal when it comes to discipline. I have found with my kids that it only takes one time to get the message across. If you take away a hunting trip from your son, I think that would be it. It's one trip, and sure it would be difficult for the both of you, but in the end would probably be the best. Taking away privileges of lesser significance to a kid will rarely have long term impact.

bigpapa

I see kids all day who don't have parents at home who make them walk the line. It's a reflection of exactly what Bawanajim is advocating. Lets not have consequences to our actions. Show the youth it doesn't matter. Do wrong you'll still be able to do the fun things of life.

So he will miss that one hunt. Next week take him. You'll still get time with him and he will grow up to have values. And no don't let him sit at home all day doing nothing. Give him something to do.

When I've left my boy at home and gone fishing I've never had him mad at me when I came home. And yes I cut the trip short so I can get back home to him. But the point is still made.

ShatoDavis

What? When did I advocate abandonment? There is a big difference between abandonment and what I do. I spend all my free time(not at work) with my kids. I agree that time spent with your kids in the woods or on the athletic field is the greatest teacher. But, withholding pleasure time ie. sports/hunting etc is a great motivator when it comes to behavoir problems.

swamp rooster

ummm bawana ,i dont think half of these guys on here even have kids,,i can see some of them are younger than i am ,and i thought i was a young fellow,,so for what its worth raise him how you want hes yours for now,but he will be 18 before you know it ,and if he keeps any hard feelings toward you for keeping him out of the woods ,then when hes gets ready to go ,he probably want ask dear o daddy to go,,but 3rd grade if he didnt act up a lil he woundnt be normal,you wouldnt believe the stuff that i did,,

Tuco

I tend to agree with your wife. This is a critical time in their behavior development. When you punish them it must be something of importance to them or it means nothing. For example making him do some chores, he will forget about that moments after it is done, but take away a day of hunting and he will long remember that. Plus he can hunt all his life, school is just a short time. We always (although it was very rarethewe hadtoo) took something away of great value....gameboy....make-up....grounding. And now my daughter is going to be driving soon, we don't have to tell here what privilege she would loose if she gets in trouble.

bawanajim

Sorry I was gone I had to go vote but I'm back so.........

I copied this from the first page on post #14 that I made.
As long as you feel you'llbe abetter influence on your child by avoiding time spent withhim I'd go with yer gut ,and stay away from him as much as possible I'm sure he'll appreciate it in the long run.

I know if you let it go One day he talks to much in class,nextday you're yer looking in to the eyes of a nine year oldpsychopath. [8D] Nip it in the bud.
Have a great one ,Jim

linkppn

I'm not a father so it is hard to relate.[&:]

flatlander73

There's nothing wrong with withholding hunting and other privledges.. Mom and dad do their part and the kid does his/hers. Do your chores, keep the grades(at least B&Cs) and no lip. In exchange they get campfire nights, fishn, horses and eating stew back at the shack after a day out during rifle season. I domy part. They have to do theirs. Mylkd knows that if theres a D on the report card, there's no going on the trip, depending on season. I left her home with her momonce, when the D appeared, hasn't happened since, knock on wood.

I want my kid to survive in the real word. In the real world, there's consequences for your actions.
Can I get an amen?

andy da animal

I know im just 18 and have no kids but im just going to say this and be gone! i understand that i havent had to deal with any of these situations you guys are talking about nor have i had to punish a kid for there actions either!

that said i really think it depends on the hunting season. If its deer and gun season, i dont know where you are or how long your season is but slug season in illinois is 3 days then 4 days for second season! very short in my opinion! i never got the chance to hunt with my dad! he got cancer when i was 7! he promised to take me when i was 8! he said that when i was 3 and cried everytime he left for the woods without me! by the time i was 8 and deer season had come around he was to sick to even stand up without support! needless to say i never got to hunt with him!

the point of the story is that i wish every season that i could have gone out with him for deer season, and everytime i harvest a deer, or am gutting one i wish i had the chance to do this with him! i use his gun and knife, makes me feel close to him i guess. but all im trying to say is that you dont know what will happen in future years! take advantage of every chance you get to go with him! i wish i could have! if the season is short i wouldnt waste it by keeping him at home, HOWEVER im not saying to let his actions go unpunished! seems like hes got a real nac at shooting that .22 take that away from him, for a while! you can shoot it anytime you want!