Off Season This is the place to kick back and shoot the breeze.

The snowman

Old 03-05-2018, 05:36 AM
  #1  
Boone & Crockett
Thread Starter
 
Oldtimr's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: south eastern PA
Posts: 13,953
Default The snowman

8:00 ...I made a snowman.

8:10 ...A feminist passed by and asked me why I didnít make a snow woman.

8:15 ...So, I made a snow woman.

8:17 ...The nanny of the neighbors complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest.

8:20 ...The gay couple living nearby grumbled that it could have been two snowmen instead.

8:25 ...The vegans at No. 12 complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

8:28 ...I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

8:31 ...The Muslim gent across the road wants the snow woman to wear a headscarf.

8:40 ...Someone calls the cops who show up to see whatís going on.

8:42 ...I am told that the broomstick of the snowman needs to be removed because it could be used as a deadly weapon. Things get worse after I mutter : "Yeah, if it's up your a***"

8:45 ...Local TV news crew shows up. I am asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I reply, "Snowballs" and am called a sexist.

8:52 ...My phone is seized and thoroughly checked while I am being blindfolded and flown to the police station in a helicopter.

9:00 ...I'm on the news as a suspected terrorist bent on stirring up trouble during this difficult weather.

9:10 ...I am asked if I have any accomplices.

9:29 ...A little known jihadist group has claimed it was their plot.

Moral of the Story ---- "When it's this cold, stay inside."
Oldtimr is online now  
Old 03-06-2018, 04:05 AM
  #2  
Dominant Buck
 
Champlain Islander's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: On an Island in Vermont
Posts: 21,428
Default

Very funny. Speaking of the snowman....looks like I better make sure the tractor mounted snow blower is running OK. Got a March snow dump coming tomorrow. They are talking over 12" possibly more. It will be that heavy wet stuff that doesn't last long but makes a mess while it is on the ground.
Champlain Islander is offline  
Old 03-06-2018, 05:26 AM
  #3  
Boone & Crockett
Thread Starter
 
Oldtimr's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: south eastern PA
Posts: 13,953
Default

Yeah, we are going to get anywhere from 6 to 10 inches, so they say.
Oldtimr is online now  
Old 03-06-2018, 07:18 AM
  #4  
Spike
 
Liv2hunt's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 52
Default

That's funny as hell! The sad fact in today's political correctness it's not too far fetched. Thanks for the laugh though.
Liv2hunt is offline  
Old 03-06-2018, 07:59 AM
  #5  
Super Moderator
 
CalHunter's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Northern California
Posts: 17,853
Default

What's funny is the people who are like those in the joke never laugh at jokes like this.
CalHunter is offline  
Old 03-06-2018, 09:10 AM
  #6  
Giant Nontypical
 
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 8,872
Default

Originally Posted by Oldtimr View Post
Yeah, we are going to get anywhere from 6 to 10 inches, so they say.
65 and sunny in the Dallas area as I type this.
flags is offline  
Old 03-06-2018, 10:55 AM
  #7  
Dominant Buck
 
Champlain Islander's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: On an Island in Vermont
Posts: 21,428
Default

Originally Posted by flags View Post
65 and sunny in the Dallas area as I type this.
A bluebird winter day here... 30 and sunny. Going to get far worse though over the next 24 to 48 hours. 65 and sunny sounds kind of nice to me right now though. Texas isn't all warm though. I remember freezing my butt off in November in San Antonio and later up on the plains in Wichita Falls during winter.

Crap they are now saying the storm will be swinging south going out over the Atlantic to pick up moisture and coming up the coast then turning back towards Vt as a nor'easter. 6-12" or 8 to 14" is the new forecast. Going fishing while I can.

Well so far we got far less than they forecast. Woke up and only see about 3" so far but it is supposed to snow all day and tonight.

Last edited by Champlain Islander; 03-08-2018 at 02:57 AM.
Champlain Islander is offline  

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off


Contact Us - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service - Do Not Sell My Personal Information -

Copyright © 2021 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.