What' s the funniest hunting story you have ever told?
 

What is the funniest thing that ever happened to you while hunting? For me, it was when I was walking to my deer stand and with the temps well below zero, I slipped on part of the plowed field that was iced over with snow, and fell pretty hard, when I got to my stand, I realized that I stunk pretty bad, I sat in my stand trying to figure out where the heck that stench was coming from then I checked my coveralls, I had broken a 12 OZ glass bottle of fox pee when I fell, Not so funny for the people when I went back to the farm house and stunk up the laundry room and kitchen.

Dr. Mike

RE: What' s the funniest hunting story you have ever told?
 

I got a million of them. It comes with age. The longer you live the more you experience.[:-] Yours reminded me of one we experience about 10 years ago. I make an annual pilgrimage to meet up with some high school buddies in NY. Every year it seemed we' d start up the mountain in the dark. This one guy wouldn' t get 100 yards from the road before he had to take a #2. It became a joke with side wagers and everything each year... trying to guess how far he' d get off the road before he had to go.

This one year it was exceptionally cold. We all buddled up in several layers and hit the hill. True to form, Donnie made it about 150 yards before the infamous, " Oh... CRAP... I got to go" . So, with laughter in the dark he undressed and dropped his new Woolrich wool bibs. He said it was cold but he had to take them way down so he wouldn' t hit them. He' s holding on a tree and leaning back. It had been a wild night and he' d had a few beers which didn' t make things real nice....if you know what I mean.

Anyway, his business was done with one violent erruption of what I call " Projectile Poopy" . He went through a few paper towels, dressed and we continued on up the mountain. About 10 three of us said we' d meet up at a particular spot in the hemlock swamp. So we' re standing there and I smell something really bad. I asked if he had to go again. He said no, but the smell has been with him all mourning. He thought it was gas. The other guy arrives and said... who stinks.

Well, we had to investigate. He took off his nice wool woolrich jacket and we found the source. He had cleared his pants from the path of his dark eruption but forgot about his nice new suspenders. Yuk!!

RE: What' s the funniest hunting story you have ever told?
 

A buddy and I were elk hunting in his car that day and we got out I sented my shoes with some elk urine ( The expensive stuff that I won at a raffle. It only comes from One bull) anyhow not thinking about it I put it up on the dash. Well later that day we kep saying " man that sent just wont go away[X(]. Well later with further investigation the bottle had fallen over and emptied into his defrost vents. Man i heard about that one for weeks and noone worse then from his wife. Oh did I mention that I just opened that bottle too.:D

RE: What' s the funniest hunting story you have ever told?
 

Refer to my post " One that davidmil will appreciate" Happened this gunseason. Taking a hefty squatting on a log and saw 4 doe cross into a field ahead of me. Crawled about 150 yards with my bibs hanging behind me and half naked to get a shot at them. Stood up exposed as the day I was born and shot one. Had to walk back where i left my back pack and tp. Was a clean kill (kinda).

RE: What' s the funniest hunting story you have ever told?
 

Dave,
EEWWWWW!!!!
Charlie
p.s. YUCK!!

RE: What' s the funniest hunting story you have ever told?
 

i was in the stand......i have the summit viper with the bar. well i had a sandwich that morning well got settled in my stand real good.it hit me good i had no time to think what to do so i sat on the bar and shot out my sandwich that tore me up.i was throwing up everywhere and crapping all over the place.won' t never forget what happned that day.


go deep hunt hard.;)

RE: What' s the funniest hunting story you have ever told?
 

One of my all time favorites happened when I lived in Georgia. You have to know the Southern boys involved to get the true flavor of it.

CHARLES: A big guy who was quiet and always carried himself like he was just a bit above everyone else. His one big flaw was he was afraid of little things, buggers and the unknown.

JAMES: A great hunter but a real cut-up and jokester.

JAMIE: Kind of a gun, reloading, overkill nut. He stored more powder at his house than a gun store.

WADE: Charles' s closest friend, all around nice guy and a true Southern gentleman.


So anyway, James came up with a plot to get Charles. We all usually showed up at the hunting camp on Thursday or Friday and hunted through the weekend. The camp was a shanty, trailer, camper little place set in an old log gathering skidder site. It was surrounded by grown up cutover. We always had a nightly bonfire, drinking spell, story telling spree around a big fire.

The plot was for James to arrive Friday night after dark, park up the logging road a ways and walk in wearing a Gorilla outfit. He was suppose to sneak in in the cutover brush, break limbs, growl and make a fuss like something BAD. The rest of us were to start a story before he arrived about some unusual sightings and noises at night as related by the local Conservation officer.(Made up of course but apporpriate) We had a standing rule that all guns were to be unloaded in the camp area, not handled etc etc.

So, we started a yarn about unusal things happening in the area.... dead cows and pigs... noises... you name it. Somewhere in the hatching of the plot WADE decided we should add one more twist. Charles was informed of the plot. JAMIE(the gun nut) was to be standing close to Charles when the Gorilla did his thing. He was suppose to be wearing one of his numerous elephant killing pistols on his hip loaded with blanks. So, the plot thickened.

The GORILLA arrived and really was convincing. CHARLES should have recieved an Oscar for his scarty cat impression. He played it to the hilt. And as his antics and fear rose, the GORILLA(James the jokester) was encouraged to put more and more enthusiasm into his performance. The rest of us kind of acted scared and backed away just as the GORILLA broke from the brush, in the dim light of the fire..... straight for Charles. At this point CHARLES rips the pistol hanging on Jamies hip from it' s holster...aims high and a tad away from JAMES(the Gorilla) and starts blasting away. The GORILLA dives for the ground and starts speaking a hurried English and does the fastest low crawl I ever saw. Charles, oblivious to the pleadings for mercy, just keeps banging away until the clip fed pistol is empty.

At this point the other 10 of us in camp couldn' t hold back. We all just about wet our pants laughing and replaying the Gorillas low crawl and fast exit. For some reason, the Gorilla was not amused. :D:D[:o]

RE: What' s the funniest hunting story you have ever told?
 

Our deer camp often had some youngsters along. Mostly from dads that were not serious hunters. Some as young as 7 or 8 yrs old. One night when the camp was asleep My buddy and myself got out a deer hoof and made tons of tracks all around the camp and by the fire. I had loaded an empty sandwich bag during the day with fresh deer droppings I had found in the woods. These also got strewn around the fire and cooking area where they would be seen the following morning. The kids couldn' t believe what they saw. DEER in our camp, lots of them. One of the adults told them that they were a joke and somone made them. One of the kids shot back " they might be able to make tracks but they can' t make ' em poop!"

RE: What' s the funniest hunting story you have ever told?
 

Some of these had me pissing myself, but I have one similar that also includes #2. It was opening morning I was 17, and I was hunting a new spot with a good friend of mine. We stopped at the local convienience store to get a cup of coffee before heading out. I knew that something happened after I drank coffee first thing in the AM, but because I was so excited to go hunting I forgot what that was.....but we' ll get to it shortly. Anyway I was driving, so we get back onto this dirt road and I drop my buddy off at his spot. I head down another 400-500 yards and park at my spot. It' s still dark, so I head into my stand. (Climber) I sit until it gets light, and I don' t see anything. All of a sudden I get that oooh soooo uncomfortable feeling that we all know and love, and it was then that I remembered why I don' t drink coffee in the Am unless I am near a bathroom. I lowered my bow, turned around to start climbing down and then it happened. I thought it was gas, but when I went to release it...........you kinda get the picture. To make matters worse I was wearing sweatpants underneath of my overalls. I climb down the tree in disgust with myself, and wondering how in the hell I am going to clean this mess up without my buddy knowing. I get out to my truck, and carefully take off my overalls. I took off everything except for my t-shirt and boots. I cleaned up with my good leg on my sweatpants, but I still reaked. The final result was me wearing overalls over just a t-stirt and boots. I drive up to pick up my buddy, and I wait a couple minutes. He comes out and he' s like dude.....WTF are you doing, I shot one deer and I was ready to shoot a second. Then he said what is that smell? I said, look we got bigger problems, I **** myself. He started laughing and said well we gotta get this deer. At least when we have these stories we can share em' without too much embarrassment. Hopefully I gave you all a good laugh for the day.

RE: What' s the funniest hunting story you have ever told?
 

HAHA! these are great but can we steer away from the pooping thing!:D