My consience is killing me (really long)
 

On Nov 5 I got an arrow into my dream buck, a wide symetrical 10pt. This is only the 2nd animal that I have ever shot at with a bow. I haven't posted earlier because I'm ashamed of myself, but my conscience is eating me up so I'm coming clean.

There was snow on the ground, I saw movement coming so I stood and clipped my release, when the monster showed himself I was discouraged that he took the trail away from me instead of the one I wanted him to take. I limit myself to 30yrds, when he passed behind the small pile of sticks marking 30yrds I grunted to stop him and took the shot at 35yrds. Disipline is alot harder to maintain when its the biggest deer you've ever seen out there (I have a135" gun buck, but this one was bigger).

I got a hit, in the boiler room but low, as he ran off I saw my arrow fletching flailing around just before I lost sight of him. I was sure that he would loose the arrow becasue it looked like it had already worked its way most of the way out.

Back to the farm with a clump of snow containing blood and dark hair to show the landowner (and his dog). Coffee for 2.5hrs.

I head out, not even wanting to track, I wanted to find the arrow that I was positive would be laying just inside the treeline for a better idea of the hit, my main concern was penetration. I found really good blood in the front left hoof prints and 1-2' off the trail, but not pink, not really dark, looks like muscle hit. After 300yrds I'm concerned, good blood but no arrow, and no bed. I didn't push this deer, why didn't it lay down? At this point I'm on the neighbours land, I pull out and drive around to the next consession and get permission from the landowner (200acres) to keep searching, I have permission but for that day only.

Back on the trail, he has been moving constantly at a trot, not running, but not meandering around browsing either. I find one spot where he stood for a time and blood pooled below him, mostly in the front left hoof print. I slowly follow the trail as it peters out to almost nothing, just blood in the front left hoofprint. 100yrds later blood on virgin snow again, but still no arrow, Where is my arrow? I become convinced that I passed by it so go back to the sight of the shot and start again, just looking for my arrow, no luck.

I reach another fence, its been 5hrs and no bed yet, but I'm confident that I'm not pushing him because there are no beds and his gait hasn't changed at all. I back out again, drive around to the next concession and get permission from one landowner, but theres no-one home at the property I really want to search. Doesn't really matter, the blood has gone from spurts, to red footprints, to one discolored footprint, to nothing, when the prints entered a staging area I circled for >1hr and lost my buck. It was getting dark, no more blood, and a patchwork of different properties with no permission and swales, swamp, and thickets everywhere.

Now is why I am ashamed, I convinced myself that I got him in the bi-cep, all signs point to that, muscle blood, blood in only that hoofprint (blood running down his leg), and no beds for more than a mile. Desicion time, I'm expected at gun camp the next day for my week of vacation. I packed up and left my buddies farm. He tells me not to worry, he couldn't believe how many times I walked concession to concession and got back soaked in sweat, I'm still convinced that this deer is still on the hoof, possibly still carrying the arrow, but I can't stopthinking that I am an arse for leaving after only 1 day of searching.

Theres the story, bring it on and flame me, I deserve it. I still think he is on the hoof, but can't stop beating myself up for leaving so soon, if I thought there was a chance of him laying dead I would have givien up my vacation to search, but I convinced myself that he was still walking around.

Anyone that wants to call me names (or reassure me that this deer will make it) is welcome to. And my sincere apologies to Team 34.

RE: My consience is killing me (really long)
 

I honestly don't have a criticism. You know the situation better than I do. If he's alive and on the hoof......what are you gonna do? Run him down?

I have no criticism, at all.I'm just sorry you didn't have a recovery.

Jeff

RE: My consience is killing me (really long)
 

Hey... Don't beat yourself up about it... It is bow hunting... It happens. You made a valiant effort to recover the animal. By the sounds of it, he is probably ok... just sore.
Anyone who would call you a name for it is very ignorant. I don't know too many bowhunters who have ever recovered every animal they have hit.
Now you know and you'll be that much more careful about your next shot.
Don't beat yourself up about it too much.

Sorry you didn't get him though.. sounds like a real dandy +135".

RE: My consience is killing me (really long)
 

It happens. If you participate in the sport long enough it is bound to happen to you. Sometimes no matter how hard you look you will never find the deer. I know how it feels it makes me sick to. But sometimes there is nothing you can do. You just have to get back up on that horse and get out there and try again.

RE: My consience is killing me (really long)
 

After admittedly skimming your story (got someplace to be in just a sec...), I come to the same conclusion: you hit him in the leg and he'll be fine.

RE: My consience is killing me (really long)
 

well put

RE: My consience is killing me (really long)
 

tschaef.....some gotta win and some gotta looze....good time charlie gots the blues......get over it and onto sumthin else

RE: My consience is killing me (really long)
 

I agree!

RE: My consience is killing me (really long)
 

It has or will happen to all hunters at some point. Don't beat yourself up over it.

RE: My consience is killing me (really long)
 

no reason to get all down on yourself... Go get a trail cam and put it out to see if you can catch a glimse of him on it. Maybe that will give you a little closure.