Ok, I know this is my 1st post, but I have been read various post on this forum from hunting to religion. I am a christian for about 10 years now, but I have a major problem. I have read the scriptures and have prayed deeply to my heavenly father, but I can't get over this "hump." I am extremely ashamed about this and am at my last straw.
Before I tell about this problem I have, I want to give some back ground information. I grew up going to church every time the doors were opened. When I was a teenager, I felt the pressure to go down front and say I wanted to be saved. Well, nothing changed b/c there was not a change in my heart or head. From about the 9th grade until about age 22, I dateda girland was sexualy involved with her.We were both each others 1st love and actuallygot interestedin each other in the 6th grade. I honeltly felt God chose her for me to marry, but because I wasn't a christian yet and was living in sexual sin, He allowed us to separate and my heart was crushed.
Currently I am happly married for over 10 years and have been a christian for about 12 years. I am 39 years old and have a wonder full job and one girl under 10 years old. Ok, so every thing seems great.
BUT, here is the problem. When I was 12 years old, I was molested twice and then when I was 13 years old, I got into pornography. I have been off and on into porn ever since. When I gave my life to Jesus Chirst at age 27, things got much better, but lately I have been failing sooooo much. I have prayed heartly to my Lord and heavenly father as well as read the scriptures, but I really am tired of this and want help. I really don't need to be "preached at", but I need advice given through love.
Bro, I really don't know what to say since I have never had that problem, but I will pray that God will deliever you and/or give you the strength to overcome this addiction that satan is put in your life. It takes a lot of courage to come out with something like this and sometimes the church looks down on people who say they have this problem. But, I bet there are many in the churches today that struggle with this same issue, so keep your head up and look to the Lord for your strength.
1 Corinthians 10:13
13For no temptation has overtaken you and laid hold on you that is not common to man.But God is faithful, and He willnot to let you be tempted and tried beyond your ability and strength of resistance and power to endure, but with the temptation He will also provide the way out, that you may be capable and strong and powerful to bear up under it patiently.
__________________
In Christ alone I place my trust.
Christians aren't perfect, just sinners saved by grace.
Love to fish, hunt, ride atv's, music at church, football, family and friends.
Have you sought councelling? It's not weak or wrong to use every tool available. There's a story that makes the point. A man was warned to leave his home, because the waters were rising and a flood was inevitable. He was told to get on a bus and evacuate. He said "No thanks, God will take care of me." Sure enough, the waters rose and the man wound up on the second floor of his home, looking out the window. Rescuers came by in a boat and told the man to get in. His reply, again, was "No thanks, God will take care of me." The waters rose still, and he wound up on his roof. A helicoptor hovered overhead and dropped a rope ladder. Again the plea to leave his home, and again the reply "No thanks, God will take care of me." A short time later, the house collapsed and the man drowned. When he arrived at the Pearly Gates, the man asked God why he was allowed to drown. God replied "I sent a bus, a boat, and a helicoptor!"
The point being that the answer is sometimes right in front of our face. We may want to see a miracle, but the answer can be so much simpler, and just as effective. Naaman was angered when he was told to simply dip to cleanse his leprosy--he was a great soldier and commander, and well respected. It seems he thought he should go perform some great act, but the simple act of dipping cured him.
I was once very close to someone who had been in the same situation as you--molested at a young age. This person did go to therapy a very short time, and the paperwork I was shown sent chills down my spine. It was as if they had been interviewed and their life's story was in those pages--but it wasn't theirs. It was the stories of several others who had been in the same situation, who didn't seek councelling in time, and had all suffered for it.
Of course you should pray about it, but you should also definately seek councelling. Don't wait for the bus, the boat, and the helicoptor to pass you by.
Chad
__________________
"We can have no '50-50' allegiance in this country. Either a man is an American and nothing else, or he is not an American at all."-- Theodore Roosevelt
A wise man's heart is at his right hand; but a fool's heart at his left. Ecclesiasties 10:2
The last four letters in American..........I Can
The last four letters in Republican........I Can
The last four letters in Democrats.........Rats
Have you sought councelling? It's not weak or wrong to use every tool available. There's a story that makes the point. A man was warned to leave his home, because the waters were rising and a flood was inevitable. He was told to get on a bus and evacuate. He said "No thanks, God will take care of me." Sure enough, the waters rose and the man wound up on the second floor of his home, looking out the window. Rescuers came by in a boat and told the man to get in. His reply, again, was "No thanks, God will take care of me." The waters rose still, and he wound up on his roof. A helicoptor hovered overhead and dropped a rope ladder. Again the plea to leave his home, and again the reply "No thanks, God will take care of me." A short time later, the house collapsed and the man drowned. When he arrived at the Pearly Gates, the man asked God why he was allowed to drown. God replied "I sent a bus, a boat, and a helicoptor!"
The point being that the answer is sometimes right in front of our face. We may want to see a miracle, but the answer can be so much simpler, and just as effective. Naaman was angered when he was told to simply dip to cleanse his leprosy--he was a great soldier and commander, and well respected. It seems he thought he should go perform some great act, but the simple act of dipping cured him.
I was once very close to someone who had been in the same situation as you--molested at a young age. This person did go to therapy a very short time, and the paperwork I was shown sent chills down my spine. It was as if they had been interviewed and their life's story was in those pages--but it wasn't theirs. It was the stories of several others who had been in the same situation, who didn't seek councelling in time, and had all suffered for it.
Of course you should pray about it, but you should also definately seek councelling. Don't wait for the bus, the boat, and the helicoptor to pass you by.
Chad
Great post LBR and very good advice. Exactually what he said and I really can't say it any better. Please keep us updated and we will pray in assurance that God will be glorified as He and others help you through. In the end, think how great a witness you can have and help so many others who are afraid to ask for help. Just remember we are here for you. Anyway, reread LBR's post for it has great value.
__________________
In Christ alone I place my trust.
Christians aren't perfect, just sinners saved by grace.
Love to fish, hunt, ride atv's, music at church, football, family and friends.
welcome atv, someone posted the other day only do things that you would do in front of you mom/wife or daughter, aside from that i would highly recommend counciling also, what you are doing could destroy all the things you listed
Quote:
Currently I am happly married for over 10 years and have been a christian for about 12 years. I am 39 years old and have a wonder full job and one girl under 10 years old. Ok, so every thing seems great.
will be praying for you, keith
__________________
John 3:16
things are more like right now than they've ever been
It is our attitude at the beginning of a difficult task which, more than anything else, will affect its successful outcome.
William James
I am so very sorry to hear the pain that you are going through. I actually heard very recently that addiction to on linepornography is the fastest growing addiction in North America. Please continue to pray and have faith. Seek counseling. Most employers have an Employee Assited Program( EAP) that is totally confidential that offers free counseling sessions. There is also some software that you can download on your computer that will prohibit any form of pornoography from being accessed by the computer. bsafeonline.com. I will keep you in my prayers.
Steve
BUT, here is the problem. When I was 12 years old, I was molested twice and then when I was 13 years old, I got into pornography. I have been off and on into porn ever since. When I gave my life to Jesus Chirst at age 27, things got much better, but lately I have been failing sooooo much. I have prayed heartly to my Lord and heavenly father as well as read the scriptures, but I really am tired of this and want help. I really don't need to be "preached at", but I need advice given through love.
Hey ..sounds alot like my life. I was molested at 6 and like you have had a terrible battle with porn. I don't know the answer for you but here is the answer for me. And to be honest with you we may never get over the scars and the addiction but we can get a handle on it. Once I was surfing the net looking for help and a man who had been delivered from it said " You must love God more than the porn.
Anyway ..this is what has been helping me. Even when you are sinning
1.Pray daily .The Word says ask and it shall be given unto you.
2. Don't hang around folks who flirt and talk trash.
3. Throw away your T.V. Even if you don't watch bad movies there is enough stuff on the advertizements to sow seeds of llust. Sex sells..
4.I partial fast daily...Romans 8 says we must mortify our flesh BY HIS SPIRIT. So we need ot be at a place where the Spirit is active in our lives and we must resist. We are promiced in James 4 :10 If we resist the devil he will flee.
5. Why fast a meal daily?? In Mark Jesus says.."Some things don't leave but by prayer and fasting. Porn is a very serious stronghold. You can be free but it will cost ya. It's just as powerful as drugs and if you continue to feed on it it can kill you. It is also illegal and there are many undercover stings going on.
6. Here's a sneaky snare as well that the Lord has laid on my heart...Be careful with the type of music you listen to, We are to ;listen to Psalms. Hymns and Spiritual songs.
7. Daily read that Bible ..even it's just one chapter. Read it slow and let your soul digest it good.
8. Many churches wink at sex sins. If your church does, leave it.
I appreciate your honesty and you are 1/2 way there by confessing your sin. The other 1/2 is loving God more than the sin, Getting rid of the TV helps but is not solely the answer because we also have to get rid of the TV in our minds. Fasting does that. Fasting makes our minds single instead of doubleminded. For as you know "A doubleminded man recieveth nothing from God."
James 4 : God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble. 7Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded. 9Be afflicted, and mourn, and weep: let your laughter be turned to mourning, and your joy to heaviness. 10Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and he shall lift you up. God bless brother, Chuck7
Brother, I pray greatly for you. I would like to know your real name or just first name so I can pray for you. Maybe we can pray for each other. Because this is one of my vises. You are not the only one. In fact, I learned at our Church, we have a support group on this because its such a widespread snare for us.
You have taken a step to understand its wrong. Thats a start.
What I did, which has helped some, is I do not have TV anymore. I get netflix, but thats it. I still have high speed internet. And think it would be best if I did away with that also. But I am an engineer, and really need the internet connection.
We have these programs at church where basically you have an accountabilitypartner who you confide in, and give an oath that both will be honest. Every week, you meet and discuss, where you went wrong that week. They say it works. I am going to look into it.
God bless you man, and pray we can overcome these hurdles.
BUT, here is the problem. When I was 12 years old, I was molested twice and then when I was 13 years old, I got into pornography. I have been off and on into porn ever since. When I gave my life to Jesus Chirst at age 27, things got much better, but lately I have been failing sooooo much. I have prayed heartly to my Lord and heavenly father as well as read the scriptures, but I really am tired of this and want help. I really don't need to be "preached at", but I need advice given through love.
Hey ..sounds alot like my life. I was molested at 6 and like you have had a terrible battle with porn. I don't know the answer for you but here is the answer for me. And to be honest with you we may never get over the scars and the addiction but we can get a handle on it. Once I was surfing the net looking for help and a man who had been delivered from it said " You must love God more than the porn.
Anyway ..this is what has been helping me. Even when you are sinning
1.Pray daily .The Word says ask and it shall be given unto you.
2. Don't hang around folks who flirt and talk trash.
3. Throw away your T.V. Even if you don't watch bad movies there is enough stuff on the advertizements to sow seeds of llust. Sex sells..
4.I partial fast daily...Romans 8 says we must mortify our flesh BY HIS SPIRIT. So we need ot be at a place where the Spirit is active in our lives and we must resist. We are promiced in James 4 :10 If we resist the devil he will flee.
5. Why fast a meal daily?? In Mark Jesus says.."Some things don't leave but by prayer and fasting. Porn is a very serious stronghold. You can be free but it will cost ya. It's just as powerful as drugs and if you continue to feed on it it can kill you. It is also illegal and there are many undercover stings going on.
6. Here's a sneaky snare as well that the Lord has laid on my heart...Be careful with the type of music you listen to, We are to ;listen to Psalms. Hymns and Spiritual songs.
7. Daily read that Bible ..even it's just one chapter. Read it slow and let your soul digest it good.
8. Many churches wink at sex sins. If your church does, leave it.
I appreciate your honesty and you are 1/2 way there by confessing your sin. The other 1/2 is loving God more than the sin, Getting rid of the TV helps but is not solely the answer because we also have to get rid of the TV in our minds. Fasting does that. Fasting makes our minds single instead of doubleminded. For as you know "A doubleminded man recieveth nothing from God."
James 4 : God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble. 7Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded. 9Be afflicted, and mourn, and weep: let your laughter be turned to mourning, and your joy to heaviness. 10Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and he shall lift you up. God bless brother, Chuck7
Man, that is some great advice Chuch7. Not just for someone who is a addicted to something but to all of us. One thing for sure, we men all have had a lust problem with our eyes to some level or another even if we haven't followed into porn and this is great advice to all of us. Thanks for this post as I am thinking about the 1st thing you mention. Do I love the Lord more than loving the desires of my flesh is the ultimate question. WOW!
__________________
In Christ alone I place my trust.
Christians aren't perfect, just sinners saved by grace.
Love to fish, hunt, ride atv's, music at church, football, family and friends.
Need help - have problem
