Dear friends,
Maybe we can come up with a plan for the prodical child. My 21 yr. old son does not offend us in our home. But lately he stays away at his friends homes up to 3 days and nights.{Male and female} and is getting hooked on whiskey. Again... at home he is sober and very respectful.
I pray and sow scriptures here and there .Any other suggestions are appreciated.
C7
Chuck7- I went through the exact same thing, except I was the son!!! My dad didn't know what to do I guess, so he didn't do anything. He told me I didn't need to be doing stuff like that, but he only mentioned it a few times, we never really "talked" about it. I am not a father yet, so my "advice" may not be worth my .02 cents, but I've been in his shoes. I would say just talk to him. I mean really sit down and talk. Not just "how was your day" or "you don't need to be doing stuff like that". Ask him personall questions, give him experiences that you've had, tell him the dangers of situations, give him scriptures, etc.
Praise God I was rescued from those same temptations, but not after I made plenty of mistakes. Better to start early than later!!!!!!!! Good luck, we'll be praying for you!!
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Member of Team "REAPERS OF THE HARVEST"
When ever I fish I do talk about life with him.Sex, God the whole nine yards.He's just enjoying sin. . Nothing hurts more than having a backsliden son.
C7
This is the main reason for the radical move in our house hold. The TV will be put in storage tonight and replaced with a CD player which which quietly be putting out songs and scriptures that glorify God.
Also when his friends call I may not be so nice. I had no idea all of his Christian friends were backsliden alcoholics. He better hope i don't answer the phone.It's no more Mr. Niceguy.
Chuck7
C7 just a word of advise, you need to work with your son with love and caring, if you push him through his friends to hard, his pride may rear its ugly head and he will move out with his friends and he will fall deeper and harder then he is right now. Then you will have no influence in his life.
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The Tazman aka Martin Price
Proud father of a Devil Dog
I agrees with Taz. The last thing you want to do is push him further away.
Not knowing the particulars of your son I will comment on what I see in general terms in our society. Just seems like so many of us parents with children in their teens to early twenties have made things a bit too easy for our children. With good intentions many of us have enabled our kids by not enforcing rules and by giving them much in the way of material goods while giving them little in the way of responsibility. Sometimes tough love will work if done with love and compassion. I see so many parents that let their twentysomething yearolds live and eat at home while not contributing anything to the budget or in the way of chores. Again I say this not as an indictment on you or anyone else..............dabow
He's 21, hardly a child. He knows how you feel about everything already. It's only for a season Chuck, Young adults have to spread their wings and find out how they want to live on their own. He will settle down in time and be a good man just like his dad did. If he respects you in your home like you say than he is already a step or two ahead of alot of young folks. Hook that tv back up and watch a basketball game with him.
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Arrows and Words. Use them wisely, once released they can't be brought back.
Chris Miles
Ulitmate Camo Web Site http://ultimatecamo.com/ UltimateCamo Water Transfer Imaging http://liquidprintone.com/
Thanks Chris,
I haven't unhooked the TV yet and maybe I won't .We do pretty good in that area anyway. I do appreciate the kind words.
God bless,
Chuck7
I have a 21 year old that is in a similar position. He has been a handful his entire life, and we have had many tense moments. The Lord put him through some pretty tough circumstnaces, and I have been there for him, pointing the way, and yet picking him up when it is legitimate to do so. The hardest thing is to know when to keep your distance and not to be codependent,interfering with the growth process.One good indication that I haven't overdone it with the correction or the distancing is that he calls me nearly everyday, just to talk. I don't harp on him, but I wait for teachable moments, and approach him just as I would someone I want to witness to--I ask the Lord to provide the oppurtunities and the wisdom.I have learned that there has to be a coupling of compassion with wisdom, and discipline has to be balanced in relation to his age and accountability.There are some things that I have to allow him to 'bump his head' about, as difficult as it is to watch.I really have to be careful not to do too much.