Question for christian men.

[TURKEY FAN]

I have found a christian women who i thought was a god send. We are just perfect for each other in every which way possible. She lives two hours away and we met on a christian dating web site.
We had went out a few dates, hit it off everything is great. I had stayed with her over the fouth of july weekend, we had kissed and held hands and talked about saving sex for marriage which we both are all for. After an incredible weekend with her and her kids, she sends me an email, saying that as a christian man i shouldnt have tempted her with the kissing and this was all too fast for her and she just wants to be friends. Well it was her that was constantly kissing and hugging me, but we had control we had a cutt-off point with the temptation of course. I just dont understand where she is coming from, is she the one who is confused or is it me? She just has cutt me off completly no talking, no email, nothing. I am confused on this one with her actions.

[Leafrivermac]

Turkey Fan, I would give her the space if it were me. Maybe let her know that you have feelings for her but that you will respect her wishes. "Let go and let God " so to speak. If it's meant to be it will work itself out. Meanwhile . .go fishing.

[outdoor338]

I agree with the last post, sometimes its not easy to understand why some people act the way they do, in your case its hard to have feelings with someone and just be cut off with e-mails, etc.

I met my wife on Match.com two years ago, she was a blessings from the Lord, we met and talked at first and then decided to meet, and honestly getting to know her through e-mails and then on the phone, was good! I wanted to get to know her during a course of time. I wanted to know how she handled life's situations, did she pray when she was stressed out, for her family, friends, etc. I think when a relationship goes to fast and the excitement wears off, then someone will get scared or cold feet, that has happened to me in the past, everything went way to quickly, and I didn't feel it was right. So, I would suggest get back on the Christian dating website and keep on looking, there is a Christian woman praying and just waiting for you to find her, so keep looking she out there, pray for Gods leading and direction. Read Proverbs 3:5,6 and keep that verse in mind as you search for her, blessings on you my friend....oh.....my wife and I got married on April 2nd of this year, just be patient....

Dr. Mike[/align]

[Rebel Hog]

Turkey Fan, what do you really know about her back ground? Is she a
divorcee or a widow? In her heart she might stillfeel for herex..
If she shows you affection one moment and then backs off the next,
she is not totally sure of her self about something.
Do you go to church on a regular base's? Do you confide in your pastor?
Consult with him onthis issue. Pray about it brother. You have my prayers.

[TURKEY FAN]

Thanks for all of your advice my brother's. It just hurt me so, when i prayed for someone like her, and then i get her and as quickly as she came she was gone. so i was angry and told god i was angry and that i still rest in him. I have been through so much with women this past year, i just need to be patient. Thank goodness deer season is coming up!

[mr-pirk]

Turkey Fan I am sure this woman would have her own side of the story, I am responding to the information presented here.

The very first thing that jumps out at me is that going bythe events you have described this woman is, more thana bit, immature.

She is blaming you for her actions.
If she allowed you to kiss her and she felt desires she didn't wantshe should have told you to stop.
If she allowed you to kiss her in hopes that it would lead to something else and you had told her you had decided not to take that step and she is upset.
She is wrong for blaming you for standing by your principles.

Either way she is wrong and immature in her reaction to what she is feeling.

Turkey Fan you haven't stated how old the woman is. It is my opinion that any woman over the age of 21 that doesn't have the decency to atleast give you chance to talk to her either on the phone or through e-mail or in person and simply decides to not answer you, is being childish.

Turkey Fan I am not so old as to not remember how it is when you start dating and you have high hopes, but I am betting that if you step back and look at this from an outsiders point of view you will most likely see signs of her immaturity level from her past actions before this weekend date you are relating to us.

Just my humble opinion, I would say that if this woman (or any woman)isn't willing to talk to you adult to adult, I would say good riddance.
Do you really want an adult child to raise too?

Her actions would also make me question why the daddy of her kids isn't with her anymore.

Turkey Fan if I have stepped over the line in any of my remarks please forgive me. I have spent several days trying to think of the kindest way to say what I have said, you post seemed to be asking the questions straight-out so I could only give straight-out answers.

Thanks
Mr-Pirk

[mr-pirk]

Turkey Fan my last post was in response to your first post, this last post is in response to your last post, lol confused yet lol.

I know exactly what you are talking about, been there done that.

I had prayed and prayed about it, for me when I gave up looking and just decided to let God work, I quit interferring, it was then that I found Mrs-Pirk.

I had asked God to help, then I spent a huge amount of time and effort trying to do what I had asked God to do for me.

When I quit trying to "help" God, andHe came through.
I don't know what God has in-store for you, but that is how it worked for me and I offer prayers of thanks to God every night at the dinner table for Mrs-Pirk and the time he gives us together.

Thanks
Mr-Pirk

[TURKEY FAN]

Mr pirk: No offense taken, so i do not accept your apology my friend.
To answer your question I am 26 and she is 27 only 10months of age difference.
I had sent her an email stating how i felt and that i am not at peace with the situation, and that i need to talk about it, and if she doesnt want to hear from me again, then fine, but i have to say what i have to say and I want to leave on good terms with her as i do with everyone else in my life. I havent heard from her as of yet. Her daughters father is a drug dealer, she had left him in florida a few years ago after there first was born then took him back after her parents refused then got pregnant again by him, and then he just up and disapeared. She is a total mystery to me, she says one thing and does another. I feel she thinks she is on a bigger level spiritually than I am, but its actually the other way around in my eyes and other christain women i have talked to about my situation. The more i talk about this more i seem to realize how she has issues that i didnt see before by the previous things she said when i would talk to her till 2 in the morning. If she doesnt respond, then i am going to cut her lose out of my mind and out of my heart but keep her in my prayers and move on. Thanks for you input, god bless

[Leafrivermac]

Turkey Fan, take it from somebody that's been around the stump a couple of times. From what you have said in your last post I would advise that you just drop this whole thing with this lady. This is not somebody that you want to have a whirlwind romance with. You are correct. She does have issues. I'm not saying that it's not possible that this is a good person, but I am saying that this is a person that you want to spend a great deal of time finding out aboutand whather issues are. It sounds like she has and that she has the capability of making many mistakes. I wouldn't be so ready to believe that hubby was the only one enjoying the rewards of drug use, abuse, and distribution. I'm taking a chance of offending you because I realize that you may be with her tomorrow. I'm only led to tell you this because I have been in a similar situation myself with bad consequences. God bless you.

[TURKEY FAN]

Leafrivermac: No offense taken my brother in christ!Yes she told me in the past she did sell and do drugs and use to strip. She was no angel, but i still didnt judge her, i like her for the person she is now. She just sent me a lengthy email, saying she is so sorry for ending it so ubruptly and that is something she needs to work on. She said she knew i felt strongly about her and she didnt want to lead me on. She is going to bible study every week, and that she is doing a prison minstry?? She said god is just pulling her in different directions right now and she has no time, that its not about us at all its about God. She said when she thinks of me which is very often it brings a smile to her face.and that she wants to call, but has no time. So i feel alot better, i just needed closure. Thanks for all your input, god bless.