Who knew?
First lady Laura Bush took over the podium from her husband at Saturday night's annual White House Correspondents' Association dinner and knocked 'em dead, keeping Washington's most powerful politicos in stitches as she worked the ballroom like a seasoned stand-up comic.
"George always says he's delighted to come to these press dinners. Baloney. He's usually in bed by now," Mrs. Bush said. "I'm not kidding. I said to him the other day, 'George, if you really want to end tyranny in the world, you're going to have to stay up later.' "
Her scripted "interruption" of the president's traditional speech -- mostly written by Landon Parvin, a longtime comic adviser to presidents back to Ronald Reagan -- included such zingers as: "George and I are complete opposites -- I'm quiet, he's talkative; I'm introverted, he's extroverted; I can pronounce nuclear. ..."
Mrs. Bush's impeccable delivery and timing -- at one point, she said her "Aunt Bea"-like mother-in-law is "actually more like ... hmm ... Don Corleone" -- was a surprise to most in the crowd, who have seen the former librarian only stand by her man and smile smartly.
"I am married to the president of the United States, and here's our typical evening: Nine o'clock, Mr. Excitement here is sound asleep, and I'm watching 'Desperate Housewives' -- with [Vice President Dick Cheney's wife] Lynne Cheney," Mrs. Bush said. "Ladies and gentlemen, I am a desperate housewife. I mean, if those women on that show think they're desperate, they ought to be with George.
"One night, after George went to bed, Lynne Cheney, [Secretary of State] Condi Rice, [Bush adviser] Karen Hughes and I went to Chippendales," she said, referring to a strip club where women tuck cash into male dancers' skimpy thongs. "I wouldn't even mention it except [Supreme Court Justices] Ruth Ginsberg and Sandra Day O'Connor saw us there. I won't tell you what happened, but Lynne's Secret Service code name is now 'Dollar Bill.' "
The 2,500 people packed into the Washington Hilton ballroom exploded in laughter. Even Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, sitting at a Washington Times table, appeared to enjoy the joke.
Although Washington's movers and shakers laughed at Mrs. Bush's performance, some in the press woke up with a Sunday morning hangover and began to criticize her monologue as immodest at best and downright bawdy at worst.
"Laura Bush cracks risque jokes at the White House Correspondents' dinner," sniffed Agence France-Presse.
CNN reporter Elaine Quijano, who attended the dinner, also apparently had her sensibilities scarred by some of the first lady's quips.
"In some respects, I think for some folks it was a little shocking because she kind of crossed the line a little bit in some people's minds," she said.
"It was very risque," the Nation's David Korn said yesterday on Fox News. "I was wondering what the social conservatives and James Dobson had to say about all these jokes that were laced with sexual innuendo. Not a very family-values-type speech. I'm not sure I want to explain a lot of those jokes to my 4-year-old."
Eyebrows were raised by the first lady's bit about the president's ranching skills, which Mrs. Bush said her husband lacked because the elite schools he attended, Andover and Yale, "don't have a real strong ranching program."
She then added: "He's learned a lot about ranching since that first year when he tried to milk the horse. What's worse, it was a male horse."
The crowd howled. The joke, a female Associated Press reporter said, "had women giggling in the bathroom."
Mrs. Bush had practiced the routine a few times -- "not too many" one aide in the first lady's office said yesterday. "She's a funny lady and it was a good chance for everybody to see the lighter side of her," the aide said.
The first lady joked about her in-laws and their Maine retreat. "Kennebunkport ... is like Crawford, but without the nightlife," Mrs. Bush said. "People ask me what it's like to be up there with the whole Bush clan. Let me put it this way: First prize -- three-day vacation with the Bush family. Second prize -- 10 days."
She joked about her husband's proclivity to spend his vacation days at their Texas ranch clearing brush: "Or, as the girls call it, the Texas chainsaw massacre. George's answer to any problem at the ranch is to cut it down with a chainsaw -- which I think is why he and Cheney and Rumsfeld get along so well."
Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld, sitting at a Washington Times table, doubled over in laughter.
She even zinged the vice president, who has had four heart attacks. "It's always very interesting to see how the ranch air invigorates people when they come down from Washington. Recently, when Vice President Cheney was down, he got up early one morning, he put on his hiking boots, and he went on a brisk 20- to 30-foot walk."
Mrs. Bush closed her act affectionately.
"In all seriousness, I do love the ranch, and I love the whole Bush family," she said at the end of her bit. "I was an only child, and when I married into the extended Bush clan, I got brothers and sisters and wonderful in-laws, all of whom opened their arms to me. And included in the package, I got this guy here."
and this is what they said,
According to an official statement released over the weekend by the Coalition for Traditional Values, an organization that seeks a more flexible relationship between church and state, Mrs. Bush's jokes at her husband's expense amounted to a public emasculation of the President. Pastor Roy DeLong, the statement's author and chair of the group, warns that the First Lady's performance comes at a time when the Mr. Bush's "manliness is already under attack."
In an official statement, one 'pro-family' advocacy group warned that Mrs. Bush's jokes at the President's expense were in violation of the Biblical command that wives respect their husbands.
As a believer, President Bush is no doubt familiar with the passage from Ephesians that says 'Wives, submit yourselves unto your husbands, as unto the Lord,'" says Mr. DeLong. "That means that just as Christ is the head of the church, the husband is the head of the wife. That is not the
Mrs. Bush interrupted a speech being given by her husband at the annual dinner, remarking that "I have a few things I want to say for a change." She then proceeded to mock his performance, both public ("if you really want to end tyranny in the world, you're going to have to stay up later") and private, noting that by nine o'clock, Mr. Bush, whom she referred to as "Mr. Excitement," is typically sound asleep.
"One of the Proverbs says that 'a virtuous woman is a crown to her husband, but she that maketh him ashamed is as rottenness in his bones," notes Mr. DeLong. "I bet President Bush is feeling pretty rotten today."
I doubt that Mr Delong.
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I read about this the other nite and knew exactly what this post was going to be. Christian conservatives gotta let this stuff slide sometimes. i though it was funny as hell. the horse joke was just plain great. left wingers in the media disapproved? what about bill clinton shagging his secrateries???
I think it was funny and cant get no more conservative then me. First he OK'd it before hand and used it as a political light spot. Church is where women are not to have authority over the man. And keep there mouths shut in church business and preaching.Plus the man is the head of the house ,confides in his wife as far as decisions.But the man makes the final decision and the wife likes it and excepts it. Mental or Phyisical abuse is not part of the relationship .No scripture OK's abuse between spouses.
Conservative Christians upset with Mrs. Bush
