I must be on the funny mailing list. Just got this unconfirmed transcript from San Francisco city Hall.
Quote:
"Next."
"Good morning. We want to apply for a marriage license."
"Names?"
"Tim and Jim Jones."
"Jones? Are you related? I see a resemblance."
"Yes, we're brothers."
"Brothers? You can't get married."
"Why not? Aren't you giving marriage licenses to same gender couples?"
"Yes, thousands. But we haven't had any siblings. That's incest!"
"Incest?" No, we are not gay."
"Not gay? Then why do you want to get married?"
"For the financial benefits, of course. And we do love each other.
Besides, we don't have any other prospects."
"But we're issuing marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples who've been denied equal protection under the law. If you are
not gay, you can get married to a woman."
"Wait a minute. A gay man has the same right to marry a woman as I have. But just because I'm straight doesn't mean I want to marry
a woman. I want to marry Jim."
"And I want to marry Tim, Are you going to discriminate against us
just because we are not gay?"
"All right, all right. I'll give you your license. Next."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Hi. We are here to get married."
"Names?"
"John Smith, Jane James, Robert Green, and June Johnson."
"Who wants to marry whom?"
"We all want to marry each other."
"But there are four of you!"
"That's right. You see, we're all bisexual. I love Jane and Robert,
Jane loves me and June, June loves Robert and Jane, and Robert loves June and me. All of us getting married together is the only way that we can express our sexual preferences in a marital relationship."
"But we've only been granting licenses to gay and lesbian couples."
"So you're discriminating against bisexuals!"
"No, it's just that, well, the traditional idea of marriage is that
it's just for couples."
"Since when are you standing on tradition?"
"Well, I mean, you have to draw the line somewhere."
"Who says? There's no logical reason to limit marriage to couples.
The more the better. Besides, we demand our rights! The mayor,
'Twosome' Newsom, says the constitution guarantees equal protection under the law. Give us a marriage license!"
"All right, all right. Next."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Hi, we'd like to get married and I guess we need a license."
"Your names, please."
"Yoyo and Spot; they are our professional nicknames."
"Professional what?"
"Professional entertainers at the circus."
"You mean you wish to marry your dog?"
"If you're discriminating against me, or my new spouse,
that's very insensitive. In fact, Spot already has a county license
so just give me one to allow us to become a legal family!"
"Well...what is the sex of your dog, I mean prospective spouse?"
"Hey, c'mon, what difference does it make. And, you
don't even ask about my sexual orientation. What goes!"
"Oh, alright, next!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Hello, I'd like a marriage license."
"In what names?"
"David Deets."
"And the other man?"
"That's all. I just want to marry myself."
"Marry yourself? What do you mean?"
"Well, my psychiatrist says I have a dual personality, so I want to
marry the two together. Maybe I can file a joint income-tax return."
Funny
Nothing tho suprizes me anymore & what ppl are capable of doing.
Did you see the man cpl on tv who moved from Cali to missippi for more trational family values, then found some dr & a surget female breeder , payed her moneys & she bore 4 childen for the man cpl 3 boys 1 girl. But then tomy the more female of the cpl also wanted a biological of his own dna( so his parents would except him*& his lifestye was the real reason ) also so had the same womon make anothr for him...5 kids made to order....now isnt that special.
CalHunter,
That was not only hilarious, but it was probably the best illustration I have seen yet of how changing the definition of marriage would completely ruin it.
I know that the govt. cannot legislate morality, but the problem we face is the forced legislation of immorality by judges who are not supposed to make laws in the first place. I for one think the problem is serious enough to our society in America that a constitutional amendment to protect marriage is called for. Don't expect that kind of leadership from Kerry.
C.Davis
__________________ Am I greedy because I don't want to give you what is mine?
or
Are you greedy because you want to take what is not yours?
A Scene At Frisco City Hall
