Three lessons on how to succeed in todays work place!
Lesson One:
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An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"
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The eagle answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
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Management Lesson:
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To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
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A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.
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"They're packed with nutrients."
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The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
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Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
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Management Lesson:
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Bull sh!t might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
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A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He laid there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
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A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
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Management Lesson:
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(1) Not everyone who sh!ts on you is your enemy.
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(2) Not everyone who gets you out of sh!t is your friend..
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(3) And when you're in deep sh!t, it's best to keep your mouth shut!
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This ends the three minute management course..
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Come out of the dark, bro. Every man knows the way to relax after a hard week's work is a good 'ole glass of ice water!!!!!!
Just kidding, Jim. I've never had a Labatt Blue. I can't drink, but if you can relax after a hard week's work with a cold brew, more power to ya! Drink one for me, and one for the homies on the 'row.
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Member of Team "REAPERS OF THE HARVEST"
Friday managment meeting!
