alleyyooper
The primer issue that you speak of is not un-common shooting the Remington. I am using Reminton 209-4's - that is the old primer for 410 shotgun shells and I iften get the primer either partially or completely pushed out of the battery cup. It has never been a problem getting the rest of the material to fall out of the nipple. The way that nipple is designed I think the problem is inherent. The nipple is designed to reach all the way through the breach plug in fact to the end of the breech almost putting it self in the powder. Becuase of that and the fact that there really are no blow-back vents in the nipple the pressure has to go someplace - so often the primer is blown out of the cup - but the cup remains for the most part in the nipple.
I on occasion will get the whole assembly cup and primer pushed back out of the nipple caught between the nipple and the face of the bolt.
I am not really to concerned about this action, for as you know I am using a 20 guage shotgun casing as my weather shroud.... In all the years that I have been shooting theRemingtons (both of them) I have never replaced that plastic shroud - the has never been enough heat or pressure to blow one out.
I think you are in good shape - I touught the 209ofchoice for most people was one of the Winchesters - it is the coolest. The drive to get you to buy special 209's at a much higher price is in my mind a gimmick. They are cooler and should reduce crud in the breech as well as the barrel, but in most cases the regualr Winchester 209A should work just fine.
The regular STS primer that you show is really a pretty hot primer - used for 12 guage and up shotguns - even for 3 1/2" magnum shells.
Here is a discusion of 209 primers...
http://www.hpmuzzleloading.com/Technical3.html
hope some of this helps....
mike