ORIGINAL: BuddyBo
I can't wait until I'm old enough to be in a county rest home so I can sit out on the front porch and laught uncontrollaby at the folks coming to visit people there.
BBO
No nursinghome for me. We are checking into the Holiday Inn! Withthe average cost for a nursing home care costing $188.00 per day, there isa better way when we get old & feeble. Wehave already checked on reservations at the Holiday Inn. For a combined long term stay discount and senior discount, it's $49.23 per night. That leaves $138.77 a day for: breakfast, lunch and dinner in any restaurant wewant, or room service.
Laundry, gratuities and special TV movies. Plus,they provide a swimming pool, a workout room, a lounge and washer-dryer, etc. Most have free toothpaste and razors, and all have free shampoo andsoap. $5worth of tips a day will have the entire staff scrambling to help you. They treat you like a customer, not a patient. Thereis a city bus stop out front, and seniors ride free. The handicap bus willalso pick you up (if you fake a decent limp).
Tomeet other nice people, call a church bus onSundays. Fora change of scenery, take the airport shuttle bus and eat at one of the nice restaurants there. While you're at the airport, fly somewhere. Otherwise, the cash keeps building up. Ittakes months to get into decent nursing homes. Holiday Inn will take your reservation today. And you are not stuck in one place forever, you can move from Inn to Inn, or even from city to city. Want to see Hawaii?They have a Holiday Inn there too.
TVbroken? Light bulbs need changing? Need a mattress replaced? No problem.They fix everything, and apologize for the inconvenience. TheInn has a night securityperson and daily room service. The maid checks to see if you are OK. Ifnot, they will call the undertaker or an ambulance.
If you fall and breaka hip, Medicare will pay for the hip, and Holiday Inn will upgrade you toa suite for the rest of your life. Andno worries about visits from family. They will always be glad to find you,and probably check in for a few days mini-vacation. Thegrand kids can use the pool. Whatmore can you ask for? So,when we reach that golden age, we'llface it with a grin.
Because I'll be staying at the Holiday Inn.